Friday, August 20, 2010

Eating is no longer fun

The clock is running out. I just have two more days before I start my treatments. I don't do well with waiting, and just would like to get things started...and then over with. I actually would almost rather hide in a cave somewhere, but I guess that isn't possible. (they would miss me at the cancer center).

I'm going to tell you a little about eating today. Eating used to be one of my favorite activities--I have become so boring and so unfun. I had yogurt today and could eat about 3 bites--then I get tired of trying and I'm really not hungry anymore. My family watches me like hawks, to make sure I don't eat anything that I could choke on. Spence brought me some little hors d'oeuvres things from his company's seminar today...and I LOVED those. If I chew really well, and drink plenty of water, I can eat some solid food. Everything has to be watered down so it's not too thick for me for get down. I do feel like my swallowing has gotten worse. To top it off, I need to drink aloe vera juice every day. I really don't like the taste of that. One of the nurses at Piper (cancer center) told me if I sipped it through a straw, it would bypass my taste buds...and would go down easier. NOT!!! That was a lie--it tasted just as nasty to me--absolutely no difference. I would like to put it in my feeding tube, but that would defeat the purpose for it...which is to coat my throat. I still like chocolate Ensure, but trying to get the prescribed amount of calories down is hard. Can you believe I think that's a PROBLEM? Who wouldn't love to be FORCED to eat more? Counting calories to get MORE is pretty weird.

I went to see the radiologist today. He put me under this machine (I have no idea what machines they are using on me), to take a picture of me again...and make sure that the marks on me (where to radiate) were in synch with the program that they had done earlier this week. After taking some pictures, he would take them into the radiologist and show them to her. She adjusted them a couple of different they would match their program perfectly. I am thankful they are trying to be so precise. HOpefully it works. :) I start radiation on Monday morning at 8:30. Then chemo starts on Thursday at 9:00. wow--it all still feels so surreal. YOu all have a great weekend...and we'll have more updates for you next week.


  1. If Aloe Vera juice tastes like the plant smells then you are a very brave woman to drink it! I used to break off a "branch" to put the gooey stuff on my face years ago. It wasn't worth the smell. I'm so sorry you can't enjoy eating anymore. You will after this is all over and we will celebrate with a huge banquet of everything you love! Love, Becky

  2. I'll sure be thinking of you on Monday am at 8:30.....and again on Thursday...I"m glad they are being precise too - it's amazing what modern medicine can do. Logan is doing so well - in 4th grade, playing soccer and football...I remember how afraid we all were - and now he is doing terrific. You will be too....with faith prayers and good doctors - miracles do have a good weekend too....Much love, Janet

  3. I will be there in spirit for sure at 8:30 am Arizona time. And it WILL WORK. Sorry the swallowing is so hard... Yes, as soon as this is finished and we get rid of this STUPID thing, we will all give you every single food you have always loved. Big hug, Sue

  4. Webe, I think of you at all times of the day and night, but will totally pause everything tomorrow at your appointment time so as to be with you in prayer, thought, and heart!! This WILL work!!! You are so strong and valiant!!
    Love you so much, Deb. PS Same for Thursday's appointment!