Louise's story

How does YOUR broom stand?

2012-03-12T18:08:00.005-07:00

`I just found out the coolest thing today...and consequently have been playing with it all day long...plus letting other people know about it. I went to work out at the cancer center today, and found out some pretty interesting stuff while I was there. (Spence says that's where I find out all the "latest and greatest" stuff!). Right now is the Equinox (I don't really know what that means or how long it lasts), but during this time, the planets are aligned in such a position that if you stand your broom upright, it will stay standing! It is the weirdest but coolest thing. I came right home, and stood my broom up. All day I have been wanting to go to the store, and take the brooms in the broom aisle, and stand them up, and then wait to see what other people would do when they saw that! I don't know if you can do it with other things besides brooms, but I DO know that my broom stands! Well, this is later on today...and Brady, my son, tells me it is not the Equinox...but whatever it is, my broom has stood all day!! Most people who have tried it have made it work. Look at the magical broom that I have! What a fun moment!! :)

Spring Break

2012-03-09T13:32:00.007-07:00

I think it's time for another post...even though my life is pretty unexciting. Right now I am in the middle of a huge mess in my house--trying to organize my sewing closet, and years and years of pictures--both are huge undertakings, and I am a little bit crazy to be working on them both. But I AM making some progress so that's good.

It's been spring break for my high school freshman, Brady. It has been a beautiful Arizona spring week, and neither one of us has worked too hard. He has enjoyed the break, and it has been nice not to have such early mornings. But we'll be back to it on Monday--all good things must come to an end.

This Sunday we get to hear my nephew, Kevin Jones, report on his mission. He just returned from the Southern California mission, and he looks great--we got to see him at the airport when he first arrived.I'm going to put a picture in of him coming in , and his family being there to greet him. I'm also including a picture of him at baggage with all the members of his family--so cool! He has served for 2 years, and has been very diligent and hard working. He is a very good young man. It is a very happy occasion when a young man returns from his mission. It is not an easy thing for anyone to do--to give up your normal activities for two years to go out and try to teach people about the Gospel...but many do it, and it is such a blessing in their lives. When our son, Brian, returned from his mission, he was a much more mature person--could look people in the eye, and talk easily with other people. So, it is a great blessing for those they teach, but it is also a great blessing for the missionaries themselves. I hope that my 3 grandsons will all be able and willing to serve missions when they turn 19. It is a great goal, and a great accomplishment. Well, I am going back to my sewing closet--no rest for the wicked (or the weary!) Have a good weekend, and tell someone you know that you love them. I need to do that too! :)

Music is my Favorite!

2012-02-28T22:47:00.005-07:00

I love music--I think the hardest sense for me to be without would be the sense of hearing. I just love a good CD--nothing can make me feel better than some good, fun, uplifting music! Tonight we had the great opportunity to go hear Vocal Point, the a capella group from BYU who went to the TV show, The Sing-Off. A few months ago a friend told me about them being on TV, and I was a fan from that time on! When I went to BYU parent's weekend, I heard them in person, and was further converted! Then I started watching them on the Sing-Off, and was so sad when they were voted off the show. But still whenever I want a good uplift, I just google them on my computer, and they perform for me right in my very own house!! But tonight Spence and I went to see them at the Mesa Arts Center, and they were totally awesome! I loved watching them perform--they are so good, but they also are having such a good time together--it was a great evening! They did a song of the 12 days of Christmas where they mixed in all sorts of Christmas songs--I don't know how they did it. Then they have this incredible vocal percussionist, who can make all kinds of sounds. You feel like they must have all kinds of instruments, and they have NONE. It was so much fun to be there--and I just hated it when they announced their last number!! They did an encore of "God Bless the USA," and that was awesome too. It was such a fun evening.

Then a week ago, I took all my daughters to see "Wicked." That is one of my favorite plays, and I love the music in it. We sat on the 4th row--so our seats were amazing, and we had such a fun time then too. So, if I could just listen to good, fun music all day long, I think I would be ever so happy. Of course, that is not real life, so I will enjoy these wonderful moments when I am entertained so totally. What fun evenings those were. I will share a picture of me with most of my girls (Jodie wasn't in this one either) before we left for "Wicked." We always have to do a crazy picture, and they are usually my favorites! I also will throw in one more of my California grandsons, Colton and Logan, the day that they left to go back home. Don't I have some awfully cute grandsons? I think so. :) Have a great day!

Fabulous Family Weekend

2012-02-24T15:22:00.011-07:00

Well, it is a week later, but I want to write about our weekend last weekend. It was awesome, and was a great family reunion for our Spencer Price family and for our whole Reed Price family (Spence's siblings and their children). We were celebrating Spence's dad's 90th birthday, and we had a great time. It was pretty much all day Saturday. We met in a park (there were about 60 of us), ate lunch, and played games. The games were great--fun getting-to-know-you games, and then more active ones,like tug of wars, and steal the bacon, etc. It was a great time for all the families to mix together, be on teams with cousins, etc., and just have a great time! My sister-in-law, Chris and her daughter, Melanie, were in charge of the games, and they did a fabulous job.

Then after a little while, we met at my father-in-law's church building, where we had dinner and a program honoring him. When you have lived a rich, full life for 90 years, like he has, there is a lot to say about you...and his chilren told all about him, his hobbies, church jobs, careers, his growing-up years, and his family. It was complete with stories and lots of fun slides. It was a great tribute to a great man. I thought one of the best things that we did was have anyone who wanted to, to come up and tell him one thing that they liked about him or that they had learned about from him. The tributes from his grandchildren were wonderful--it had to make him feel good. He has touched a lot of lives, and shared his love and example with all of us. What a blessing to be part of his family.

Because we had all our kids here for the weekend, we also had our son, Brady's Eagle Court of Honor. That was on Sunday night--our kids participated in it, and did a wonderful job, and it was a great program, honoring Brady and his accomplishment. Spence had also put together a slide presentation for that--Spence worked hard to make this whole weekend come togther.

It was great to have all our kids together. They are becoming such good friends, and truly enjoy being together. All of you who have little children, who rarely get along, and seem like they'll never be friends, just HANG ON!! They really do grow up, and get to like and even love each other--and it's worth it all. :) I love being with my children, and see them having such a good time being together. It is one of the greatest joys of a parent, I'm pretty sure.

I am going to include some pictures of my kids. Several of them are with their granddad, but then some are taken at our home. You'll have to put up with a lot of pictures this time! Ok--I'll give you a quick run-down of each picture, starting from the top. This one is of Kelsey and Brady at Brady's Court of Honor--they love to tease each other, but they are very close. Then here is Brady with his granddad at the court of honor. The next one is of Brady with all his Price aunts (except his Aunt Chris)--it was pretty amazing that they were all there. The next one is of us with Brady as he was receiving his awards, and giving us our parents pins--that's what parents get for helping their Scout achieve this award. The next picture is of Brian and his family at the birthday celebration--Brian, Keri, and his two boys, Logan and Colton--such cute boys!! After his family is Emily with her husband, Michael, and their baby SJ (or Spencer Johnson). Last but not least, are our newlyweds, Katie and Cody with Granddad. We are just missing a picture of Jodie--I'll need to put that in my next entry. thanks for putting up with this very long entry--it was a great and memorable weekend, and I'm thankful we could all be here. The hard part for me is when they all have to leave and go back to their homes.

Some Random thoughts

2012-02-12T17:36:00.004-07:00

Ever since I wrote about the Tabernacle Choir, I've had some random thoughts that I wanted to share...so it's pretty unbelievable I'm writing again, just 2 days later. So you get to hear some of my ramblings, for better or for worse.

It is easy to get caught up in thinking you HAVE to have certain things, whether it's the latest in computers, or clothes, or shoes or purses. It can be big or small, but we seem to easily slip into thinking something is a necessity, when it really isn't. In the last couple of days, I've heard about super awesome sewing machines or really the latest and greatest computer, or whatever. There is nothing wrong with that, and there is some pretty cool stuff out there. It's just when we think we have to get the latest and greatest, and can't be satisfied with all that we have. Let me give an example. There is this guy who is the trainer at the cancer center. He was determined that he needed a new bigger screen for his computer, and so he made a study of the best one to get. In the middle of that, he got an email from a friend of his, who is really struggling financially, and was really having a hard time just getting by. So this trainer told his kids about that--not only did this man give him that money that he had been saving for the screen, but his kids also wanted to give some of their Christmas money to help out this friend. It is experiences like that that make me think of those things that I feel are necessities, when really they are luxuries. This is not a commentary on anyone else's choices, but it is just some thoughts that I have had--and some feelings that I need to evaluate what I am doing with my extra money or time. There are good, better, and best choices, and I need to figure out what those are for me. Here is a little poem that a friend gave to me years ago--"Good, better, best, never let it rest, until your good is better and your better's best." I guess that can be applied to both how you use your time, and also how you spend your money. I was given a book by another friend, and I love the title. It is called, You Can Never Get Enough of What You don't need." What a thought. Anyway, for what any of that is worth, those are some of the thoughts I've had lately. Have a great week, and a happy Valentine's Day...even if it IS a Hallmark holiday!! Love to all, Louise

Wow--the MoTabs!

2012-02-10T23:31:00.003-07:00

Tonight we had the great experience of hearing the Mormon Tabernacle Choir in concert at US Airways arena! It was fantastic! They were here to put on a concert to commemorate the 100 year birthday of Arizona, and they were so good. They also had the Orchestra from Temple Square here too, and they also were so very good. They did all different kinds of music, including a song from Nigeria, that was way cool. They were great performers as well as singers...and it was such a privilege to be there and to witness that. They had a soloist on some of the classic spirituals, like "Rocka my soul in the bosom of Abraham" and "He's Got the Whole World in His Hands," and those were just great! We went with some friends, and got to sit in a suite, and that was a fun experience too. We brought some people who had never heard the choir sing, and they were just blown away. It wsa just a tremendous evening. I have heard the choir sing on TV, and in different broadcasts, but this is the first concert of theirs that I've attended. They haven't performed in Arizona for 47 years, so it was about time they came back here to bless us with their talents. They are an amazing group, and have inspired people for years. They sang "Battle Hymn of the Republic," as one of their closing numbers, and that is just awe-inspiring. As an encore, they sang "I love Arizona," and I felt such a pride for this state that I've lived in for so many years. It has a rich pioneer heritage, and when you think of the pioneers that came here, they put up with a lot--with trying to settle a place with such extreme temperatures and so little water. They were valiant and dedicated people, and I am proud to have them as my heritage...even if I just claim that heritage because I live here. :) The Choir is such a tremendous missionary tool for our church, and I am so thankful for the ways they have blessed peoples' lives for years. I am just so thankful I could go. I love music anyway, and my heart was touched. Music has a way of speaking to our souls that can be done in no other way. When they sang at the very end, they sang, "God Be with you Till We Meet Again," it was like a final blessing on the whole evening. What an experience--I am so grateful I could be there.

Thank Heavens for Friends

2012-01-31T20:25:00.003-07:00

WOW--tonight I just had a very unique experience. I just talked to a friend whom I've known and cherished as a dear friend for years. Maybe it was just the wrong time to call and maybe she wasn't in the mood to talk, but I truly felt like she didn't want to talk to me AT ALL. It has made me stop and think a little about friends and how much they mean to me. I try to keep in touch with people, and to be interested in their lives. I learned a lot from my mom and dad about how to be a friend--EVERYONE was their friend, and they really worked at keeping in touch with those people. In fact, THEIR friends became OUR friends. In the last few days we've had some fun contacts with people who have been friends for a long time. In Church about a week ago, a friend was there who moved away a few years ago, and came back to visit. It was such a joyful reunion to see her, and to visit for a few minutes. Our kids played in a mother's group many years ago, and those ties still mean a lot to both of us. On Saturday night we went out with 2 couples whom we knew when we were first married--every time we are together it is like we just pick up from where we were the last time we were together. It is like FAMILY to be with them, and we love them very much. Both of those couples are couples whom we have looked up to as examples for years--what a blessing to still be friends. Today I was with a cousin who is also a very dear friend, and with her daughter, and her brand-new baby girl. What joy there is when we share our lives with those around us--being with others can't help but enrich our own lives. So, tonight I just have been reflecting on how powerful those friendships are in my life...and what a strength and a joy they are to me. When I think of people like that, I think of the little song that says, "Make new friends, but keep the old/ One is silver and the other's gold." Many thanks to so many people who are those "golden" friends in my life. I love you very much, and count your friendships as some of the greatest gifts of my life.

Happy Day to You!

2012-01-23T06:59:00.006-07:00

Well, I haven't written in a while, so I thought I would write a little today. The new year is off to a pretty good start. I am still working on resolutions--I spend a lot of time making them, and probably not nearly enough time trying to work on them!! But at least I get a good list of what I HOPE to do this year...and hopefully make at least a stab at completing some of them!

I am trying to learn how to make a book out of my blog--I would like to have a hard-covered record of my cancer journey--for myself mostly, just to reflect on the incredible experience it really has been. I have been studying of how to do that, and it is quite the process. Right now I am gathering pictures for it. I am also working on pictures for a slide show for Brady's court of honor. I enjoy working on pictures--I just take way too many of them to ever keep up!

I am really proud of my two daughters, Katie and Kelsey, who are both in school right now. Katie is in a very difficult semester, with both lots of classes AND student teaching--she does the classes first, and then later on in the semester, she teaches. It takes a lot of time and is a challenge, but she is working very hard. Kelsey is also doing very well this semester--her first semester at BYU was a lot of adjustments, but now she has "learned the ropes" and is doing well with time management and in her classes. I am very proud of both of them, and for how hard they are working. We talked to both of them for a long time last night, and that was awesome--love them both a lot!

I have had kind of a challenging week, health-wise. I'm not sure exactly what to do or how to handle it. Last night we were at a fireside, and I had not felt well, and got really hot, and had my dumping syndrome symptoms. I laid down on a couch, and had hot flash problems. This week I have dealt with dizziness and lots of fatigue. It is challenging to know what to do. I know if I try to do too much in a day I pay for it. I know if I eat too much or the wrong kinds of foods, I also have to pay for that. I keep hoping to be totally "normal" again--and maybe that will never happen quite the way I hope. I am not trying to feel sorry for myself, but it is kind of frustrating to have these ups and downs. I guess I just need to keep pacing myself, whatever that means...and hopefully just rest when I feel like I need that. I can do so many things I couldn't do even 6 months ago, but then I have these incidents. Oh well--I guess I should just be grateful for whatever I can do, and try not to worry that I can't do everything. Spence is always a great support. I DO miss Kelsey--she was always so sensitive to how I felt. But, all in all, I just need to be thankful for where I am, and pray for guidance in taking the best care of myself.

Just to give a few pictures--I am going to include a picture of Brady after he passed his Eagle board of review. His interviewer (main Scout guy--there are 2 other guys who sit on his board) was very complimentary of Brady and commented what a good young man he is (music to a mother's ears!). The other picture is of us with Jodie at her play that she did this month--she was awesome in it! If you ever have the chance to go see handicapped adults perform, be sure and take advantage of it. It is an experience like no other! Have a good week!

Another day to give thanks!

2012-01-13T15:03:00.003-07:00

WOW, I just read my blog from a year ago--I guess I say it too much, but I am SO thankful to be where I am today rather than where I was a year ago, where I had just had a second surgery to correct a collapsed lung. Today I was at my father-in-law's, and ran around the yard with their brand-new darling puppy. What a joy to be outside, to be enjoying our beautiful winter weather, and to be carefree with a little puppy! There is something so totally fun about a puppy--they are just the cutest!I tried to take a picture of her, but she would never stand still long enough for me to catch her...so I ended up taking a video of her.

I am taking a break right now--doing that dreaded job of putting Christmas away. What a lot of work that is! I loved my Christmas decorations this year, and didn't want to take them down...but it's time. Last year my kids took down my decorations because I was going in the hospital. I don't want to go back to the hospital, but maybe I should plan on being sick every January, so someone else can do all this work. It takes SO MUCH time! Anyway, I just thought what a contrast this day was...and how thankful I am (even though I complain) to be well enough to do all of this...and to enjoy a beautiful Arizona day!

Plus--we had a great accomplishment in our family last night--Brady, our 14-year-old, went to his Eagle board of review, and PASSED. He is now an official Eagle Scout, and we are VERY proud of him! Way to go, Brady! Have a great day, everyone!

What a difference a year makes!

2012-01-03T14:19:00.003-07:00

I am sure most of you don't remember what you were doing on January 3rd, 2011. Actually, neither do I, since I was so out of it. It is the day that I had surgery a year ago...and the doctors made sure that I remembered none of that day. But I just reread Spence's entry in my blog that day, and I can't tell you how grateful I am to be where I am today...and not where I was last year. What a journey it has been since then, and I can't believe how "normal" my life has become again. I can do most of the things I could do last year, I work out more than I did last year, and I have had a truly blessed year. But it was a tough journey, and I could never thank Heavenly Father or the people around me enough for carrying me through all of that. I have had many people call my recovery a miracle, and I believe it is. As I've expressed before, I have a lot to live up to, since I was blessed so much. I still have people expressing concern for me, and wondering how I am feeling. I still have adjustments to make in my life--like eating is still an adventure (and sometimes a trauma), and I still have "dumping" problems, sometimes when I least expect it, and I sometimes wear out quicker than I would like...but all in all, I am very blessed. Look at what happened in 2011 for me--I was able to recover from major surgery, and I grew hair back...in spite of chemo and radiation! I welcomed two darling new grandsons into our family, and gained a new son, when he married our daughter, Katie. We had many wonderul moments--vacation at the beach, a fun Thanksgiving, a truly blessed (but a little bit lonely) Christmas, and many family times with our immediated family, and also with extended family members. Many people sacrificed time and money to spend time helping me with my recovery, and I appreciate that more than words can say. One of the sweetest things I heard this year was when my daughter, Kelsey, made a comment on her Facebook page, expressing her thanks on Christmas," I am very spoiled, and I love being with my family...and my mom is cancer-free." As you might remember, she was the one (besides Spence) who was by my side every step of the way. Writing Christmas cards this year was truly a pleasure, because it gave me a chance to express gratitude to so many dear friends and family who kept praying for me and pulling for me. My hope is, of course, for continued good health, but also that I can help others who may have heavy burdens to carry in 2012. It would have been so different if I had had to go through this experience by myself--how blessed I am to have an incredible support system, and a loving Father in Heaven, who blessed me so that I could still be around. I wish words could adequately express the love I feel for so many of you who followed my blog, and continued to pray and fast for me. I wish I could repay, even in a small degree, all that you have done for me...but in spite of my inability to do all that I would like, please accept my love for you...and my eternal gratitude. YOU helped bring about the miracles that I have experienced in my life. Thank you, and a happy and blessed new year to you all, Louise

Happy New Year!

2011-12-31T20:34:00.003-07:00

Well, it is New Year's Eve--we are not big party animals, so we are just home, watching a Suns game, and having a quiet evening at home. I am actually working on a sewing project--we are not the most exciting people out there, but we are glad to be home and to be safe...and that counts for something. I have talked to most of my kids today--they, too, don't have big plans for tonight. I just can't get my mind off what I was doing a year ago. A year ago, I was 3 days away from having surgery, and spending 18 days in the hospital. Of course, a year ago, I didn't know what that all would entail, and I am thankful I didn't know what an ordeal it would be. I am sure that my family didn't have any idea either of what it all would entail--how grateful we are to be a year later, and to have that behind us. Who knows what 2012 will bring...but we are grateful so very much for my improved health, and all the blessings that have come to us this year--the addition of a new son, and of two new grandsons, who make us so very happy. Life does go on, in spite of health issues, and challenging things, and with the help of the Lord, we are given the strength to meet the challenges that come our way.

I am so grateful for the many people who helped us through this tough year--who were there with encouraging words, or funny cards, or with a hug when we needed it. I am thankful for countless acts of kindness--for meals and for rides for my children, and for support in so many different ways. I hope that in this coming year I can be as kind to people as they have been to me. I just feel so very thankful for the gift of life, and for the blessings of my Heavenly Father to me and to my family--to help us through 2011. I am grateful for a new year and for opportunities to serve and to learn and to hopefully grow closer to my Savior, and to the way He lived His life--which was in service always to those around him. May you all be blessed with a beautiful and joyful 2012, and may you have the strength and courage to meet whatever challenges come your way. Hopefully, we'll be there for each other in the coming days and months. Much love to you all, Louise

Merry Christmas!

2011-12-24T11:50:00.002-07:00

Hello and Merry Christmas! I'm sure none of you have time today to be looking at people's blogs, but I thought I would post anyway. We are busy doing last-minute things, but unlike other years, it looks like our wrapping is pretty much done. WOW--that is amazing. We stayed up till 2:00 last night, rather than tonight--maybe some sleep on Christmas Eve. That would be a unique thing.

I have to share some feelings right now. Christmas is a very tender time for me, as it is for so many of you...and it is very tough to not have my children here. I am thankful today for my youngest, Brady, because he still basically likes to be home. It is hard to have children grow up, and get on with their own lives. I know that is reality, but it is a hard reality for me. Last night we had a lot of fun skyping with our daughter, Katie, and her husband, Cody, as they opened their Christmas presents from us. It just hit me this morning that none of them will be home for Christmas this year...and I got very emotional. I now need to go on with my day, and be grateful for all that I have. The holidays are a wonderful time, but they are also a time of sad emotions, when you can't be with ALL the people you love. I guess it's like the Christmas song says, "I'll be home for Christmas...if only in my dreams." May the Christmas spirit be with all of you, and may you know how much I love each of you, and how especially much I love each of my children and grandchildren. I hope they will feel that love over the miles. Merry Christmas to all of you! Much love always, Louise

"Real Life" Christmas

2011-12-10T23:07:00.002-07:00

Well, my last post was the ideal...and today I hit total reality when it comes to the frustrations and stresses of the holiday season. Today I hit the wall, and realized as I do every year, that I am trying to do too much, that I have focused on the unimportant things and let them take over my life...and that I might preach about enjoying all the little things of Christmas, but I too feel the tension and high expectations...and frustrations that everyone complains about! This was my day. I got up, and started working on Christmas cards. Then, I made a trip to Mesa, because I get this meat at a great price, if I buy it in bulk. Then I needed to get home so that people who have bought the meat can come pick it up. Then, my oldest, Jodie, needed to get her hair cut, and buy Christmas presents so we can send them off to her nephews. When we went to take her back to her group home, no one was there, so she continued on errands with me. I went to one store to check out a certain present, and it was about 3 times as expensive as I wanted to pay...so I went home, found the same item on Amazon, and it was even MORE expensive there. See, talk about getting caught up in the thick of thin things--that is me totally today. Then, I snapped at my teenager, because I was tired of running everywhere, and I was frustrated that my house is a mess, and because my trees aren't decorated... and all this stuff just goes on and on. Life just hasn't stopped for me today, or maybe I haven't stopped to really live. OBVIOUSLY, I need to take a TRUE reality check, and remind myself that all these things I got hung up on today really don't matter. SIGH--it is so easy to lose perspective, even when your intentions are good. Thank goodness tomorrow is Sunday, and I won't shop and I won't be so busy, and maybe I can regain some eternal, more meaningful perspective. The problem with Christmas is we try to do our regular life things, plus add a whole bunch more on top of that--and it just doesn't work. WOW--this entry was really time of confession! I am way too human, and way too caught up with "stuff." Here's to a better tomorrow...I hope!

Let's Enjoy Christmas!

2011-12-07T16:57:00.002-07:00

Well, true to my technological genuis, I posted this great post this morning, but then I did something and lost the whole thing. Even Emily, who always helps me, coulnd't do anything because I had messed it up so badly! Anyway, I wanted to share the words of Music and the Spoken Word, that was broadcast the Saturday after Thanksgiving. I loved the counsel he gave to enjoy the season. So I'm going to share that with all of you.

The Journey to Christmas Delivered By: Lloyd D. Newell
The month of December is a time of joyful anticipation. The sights, sounds, and smells of the season evoke feelings of excitement and wonder. For generations, children—and grown-ups—have used advent calendars and paper chains to count down the days. But does our focus ever become so fixed on the future that we forget to enjoy the journey to Christmas?

This year, instead of just looking forward, let’s also take pleasure in the preparations: in the little, less spectacular moments along the way, even in the spontaneous joys that may, at first, seem like interruptions to our bigger plans. In order to recognize those moments for what they could be, it sometimes helps to slow things down a bit. We may need to shop less and savor more. We might have to dim the bright lights in order to see the stars in the heavens, but if we look, we will find them.

Often it takes a child to redirect our focus. Think of how much children enjoy the present moments, the preparations, and not just the finished products. When helping to decorate the home, wrap presents, or bake Christmas treats, they usually make more of a mess than we would; they might not do it just right, but they also usually enjoy the moment more than we do! Their enthusiasm can be contagious.

A three-year-old girl, wholeheartedly living in the present, exclaimed: "It’s not tomorrow! It’s not today! It’s to-now!” When was the last time you felt "to-now”?

Yes, we are busy. But the days leading to Christmas are not just to be endured. In fact, perhaps they offer more of what the season is really about. The promise of Christmas is everywhere to behold. It’s not saved for Christmas morning. If we have eyes to see, ears to hear, and hearts to open, we truly can enjoy the journey to Christmas.

I know that December is a crazy time of year,but I like how he says "We may need to shop less and savor more." What great advice! Sometimes it is easier said than done..but I hope that I can take the counsel given, and truly enjoy the journey of Christmas, and not just the day of Christmas. I hope you are all doing well, and that you know I am very grateful for all the people who have helped me in MY journey this year towards better health. Your friendship and support and faith and prayers have been gifts to me all year long. May you be blessed at this time of year. With much love for you, Louise

A very Thankful Thanksgiving

2011-11-29T17:14:00.006-07:00

Well, it has now been nearly a week since Thanksgiving, but it was a great time. Thanksgiving was my mother's favorite holiday, and in many ways, I think it is mine too. I love the idea of just focusing on things you are thankful for, instead of always thinking of the things that you don't have or that you think you want. I was so thankful that all of my girls could be home for Thanksgiving. Unfortunately, our son, Brian, and his family weren't able to come, but other than that, everyone else was here. It was a lot of fun. The best times were when we were doing something together and could just visit as we worked together. We made parts of Thanksgiving dinner together. Our new son-in-law, Cody, is from Idaho--so we used his expertise in making mashed potatoes. Our daughter, Emily, needed to make some things for a Young Women's program that she is in charge of so we helped her with those...both those times, it was fun to be together and working and talking together. The boys all played in a football game with our ward members, and then on Saturday, they went to play racquetball together. My kids did the crazy shopping Black Friday sales late on Thursday night. Now I have to say that having stores open on Thanksgiving made me a little bit sad. I have always loved that day and its non-commercialism, so I felt badly that people were shopping and that stores were open. By the way, I went on Saturday, and there were very small crowds, and most of the deals were still on. That's the way I like it a lot better! I just missed the doorbusters, where people literally fight for the deals. Thanks, but no thanks!! :)

I loved having my kids home. I loved this Thanksgiving as I thought of a year ago when I was just recovering from chemo and radiation...and where I was anticipating a major surgery in January. To be able to have Thanksgiving at our home, and to be able to host 32 people there was truly a blessing. My kids helped a lot, and I could eat food--and enjoy all the yummy things! Spence had me say the prayer for Thanksgiving dinner--he told me that he did that, because I had the most to be grateful for...and that is true. I will post a couple of pictures of our family. The baby is Emily's baby, SJ. Family times can be kind of crazy, but it is good to be with people whom you love and who love you back.

Great News--Still a survivor!

2011-11-19T07:44:00.002-07:00

Yesterday was a wonderful day in my cancer journey...and it is a journey. You have to keep checking in with the doctors and having tests to see how you are doing. On Monday I had a pet scan, which is a test that shows if there is any cancer in your body. You do an MRI, and different areas "light up" if there is cancer there. It is a very easy test, in most ways. While you are waiting for the scan, you get to relax in an easy chair listening to music. They even let me listen to music as I was going through the actual scan. Yesterday we met with my cancer doctor, and the pet scan was perfectly CLEAR--no sign of cancer anywhere! We were so happy and grateful. We decided this time not to tell anyone that we were doing the test--it seems harder when other people are worrying along with you, so we figured we would just let people know the news when we knew what the news was! That makes it a year since I have been cancer-free. If any of you remember, I did not have cancer when I did my surgery in January, but needed to do the surgery just to make very sure that we had gotten it all...plus I needed the surgery so I could swallow again. I guess when you have any disease, you always have the thought lurking in your mind, "what if it comes back?" That is always a possibility, so every time we hear that it is NOT back, we are grateful for the gift of more time. It has made me feel very thankful to my Father in Heaven, and made me also very aware that He has spared my life...and that I need to do all that I can to seek to do His will, and to do those things that He would want me to. He has given me the gift of extending my life, and I need to do what I can to serve Him, and to show my thanks by the way that I live. Spence is so happy and thankful--and I owe him big time for all his love and support through this continuing challenge. I have many other people to thank too, especially my sisters, who have been so loyal and devoted and caring through all of this. For me this year, Thanksgiving has already come!

Happy 11-11-11 to You!

2011-11-11T21:58:00.003-07:00

I couldn't resist writing on 11-11-11, so even though I don't have anything very profound to say, I am going to write. I have thought a lot about the veterans on this day and am glad that our schools will honor them by having this day off. I didn't really do anything to honor vets today, except giving some money to a guy who was standing outside our grocery store, and was collecting money for the vets. I AM grateful, however, for all those who have served our country and cared enough about our freedoms to put their lives literally on the line for us. They certainly deserve our recognition and gratitude.

Nothing too much is happening around here. The holidays are creeping up way too fast...but at lesat this year I am going to be able to do more things, and be more involved. It is pretty amazing how feeling better can make such a difference in your life. Most of our kids are coming home for Thanksgiving, so we're very happy about that. It is hard to share the holidays with in-laws--wish I could have all my kids here all the time, but it just doesn't work that way.

One thing I am thankful for this week is a dear friend in Utah, who went out of her way to buy and bring flowers to my daughter, Kelsey, who needed a little extra sunshine this week. That was so nice of my friend, and meant so much to Kelsey. Another example--of how little things really ARE the big things.

This is a beautiful time in Arizona. we don't have fall leaves or anything like that, but the cooler temperatures and shorter days are really nice. I think that fall is my favorite time of year here in Arizona. Unfortunately, when it's spring, all I can think is that the heat is coming soon! Well, like I said, I don't have much to say...but still am feeling thankful for our country and for the freedoms that we enjoy. I am thankful for my health, and for my ability to work out several times a week...all those are very real blessings to me. Have a good weekend!

Can you believe it's already November? !!

2011-11-04T22:49:00.007-07:00

Well, happy November! I never did write again before Halloween. Now I am home, and am done traveling for a while. 2 weeks was a while to be gone...and it feels good to be back home. I read in my journal today about what I was doing a year ago...and was feeling so grateful for the progress I've made in the last year. Then I ate some very old cheese, and thought I was experiencing the dumping syndrome again--getting hot and needing to be under a fan, and feeling pretty out of it. However, it was more what I ate than any problems with my system. SIGH...it never seems like your body acts just like you want it to. However, I got feeling better, and was able to go out with some friends tonight...so I am doing better. Since I've been home, I have worked out at the cancer center. I have so many things to be grateful for...and my improved health is proably one of the biggest ones I have to be grateful for. I am so thankful that my Heavenly Father has healed me, and performed miracles in my behalf.

I had a good time on my trip--I loved being with my family. I got to see most of my out-of-town kids, and that was great. I loved being on BYU campus, and am so thankful that my Kelsey can go there. I loved seeing ALL of my grandsons...and especially to be able to meet our newest member, little baby Colton. What a cutie...and what a good baby. I loved being with Logan, who is my oldest grandson, and who is so cute and so smart...and such an enthusiastic little guy. Every time he leaves the room, he lets you know that he'll be "right back!" It's so cute. He loves strawberries, so we kept a good supply of them in the frig! Emily is a beautiful mother in Utah with her cute 6-month-old, SJ, who looks just like his mama. Emily is so photogenic that any picture you take of her is beautiful...even if she's in her bathrobe and hasn't washed her hair. She cut her hair and looks so cute!

I loved being with Brian and Keri. They are good parents--and are working hard to make the adjustments to being a family of 4. Brian is very good to me, and I feel very loved when I am with him. We had some really good talks.

I DID miss my boys, Spence and Brady. They did come up for the weekend before Halloween, so they could be there when Brian blessed little Colton. He did a really good job, and it was so nice that they could be there to share that with all of Keri's family.

Everywhere I went my kids took good care of me. They are still patient with me when I need to take rests, or just need to have breaks in my day. I wish I had non-stop energy but I don't...and I appreciate their awareness of that. I am thankful to be back home--even laundry and dishes seem like fun (at least for the first couple of day) when you're back in your very own home. Well, as you can see, I have much to be thankful for. I hope I will work at remembering how blessed I am...and how fortunate I am to be able to travel and share in some of the wonderful events in my family.

You can see that I have included more pictures of baby Colton. Then there is a picture of me and Kelsey at BYU. The last one is of our little SJ, Emily's baby. He is awfully cute! Well, here is the latest from me--hopefully, you are enjoying this beautiful time of year. With much love always, Louise

Hanging out with my kids!

2011-10-25T22:10:00.005-07:00

It has been quite a while since I wrote--almost 2 weeks. It has been a crazy time, and I just haven't made the time to write in here...but I have a lot of news to tell. I am in California right now with my son, Brian, and his wife, Keri, and their TWO sons, Logan (who is 2) and Colton, who is 5 days old! He was born while I was in Utah with my two daughters, Emily and Kelsey...so, you can see, I am getting the bonus of seeing several of my kids...and all of my grandsons! Pretty lucky, huh? It was parents' weekend at BYU, so I was there with Kelsey for that. I am including a picture of her in her brand-new warm coat that we bought while we were there. It was great to be on BYU campus--I loved going to that school, and there is a great spirit there.

Before I went down there, I spent the evening with Emily and her 5-month old, SJ...so he'll be in the picture in the car seat. He looks so much like her, it's pretty unbelievable...and we had a fun evening with him, while he was trying with all his might to crawl--SOOO cute!

I got to be with my dear friend, Sharie Johnson, and all her kids and her parents on Sunday night...and that was a big treat too. I grew up with her, so her kids are like my family, and her parents like my second parents. It was wonderful to be with them all.

Then Monday (yesterday) I flew to Sacramento via Portland, and then took a shuttle to Redding, where Brian lives. This baby is so cute, so the newborn would be our brand-new Colton. He looks so much like his brother, Logan, and so far is as good a baby as Logan was--quite amazing. :) I am enjoying being with all of them, and hopefully getting to do some things to help them. Holding the baby is just a bonus if you ask me!! :) what a treat! Spence and Brady will come up on Friday, and we will have him blessed on Sunday--so it is a happy time for our family.

Oh, and one more thing. Since I wrote, Brady did his Eagle project, so I will put up a picture of him with his fellow Scouts. They are good boys, and were a great help. Brady did an awesome job of organizing the whole thing--if you can believe it, we had 41 people from our ward (our local Church congregation) come. We had so much help, and we got that house looking spotless! Great work from a lot of very nice and supportive people.

So, that's it from here. So far my health has held up. Climbing stairs in the altitude at BYU was pretty tiring...but I made it ok. I loved seeing all the fall leaves, and enjoying that cool, crisp fall air. :)If I don't get back to writing in time, a happy Halloween to all of you!

Happy Anniversary to Us!

2011-10-12T22:58:00.002-07:00

Today is our 37th anniversary--we are OLD married folks!! But I am thankful for all those years, and what they mean to us. Tonight we went to the temple, and then out to dinner. Spence asked me to tell what some of our favorite trips have been. We have really been blessed to go to a lot of places and to have many fun memories. It was fun to reminisce. I just feel very fortunate to have been married to such a good man. He has been a constant through the ups and downs of life. He has been there to support me, to make me laugh, to love our children, and to be just an awfully good guy. With Spence, he has always been "genuine," ( a word that his Granddad JR Price used to call him), and what you see is what you get. There is nothing phony about him, and he is dedicated to good things-to his family, to being a good provider, to being committed in his Church responsibilities, and in his love for his Father in Heaven. He is not perfect, as he will quickly tell you, and he is a huge tease, and has lots of fun along the way. I have always admired his ability to balance the different areas of his life...and to never take himself or anyone else too seriously. He has been a fabulous example for our kids, and they all love and admire him. I am glad he is my friend--he has been a listening ear to me over the years. I am thankful that he continues to choose good things in life-- he really has his priorities straight. Being married to him is probably the best decision I ever made (besides joining the Church--the two big decisions which have made all the difference in my life!) So I am feeling thankful tonight, and wanted to let you all know that I did well in the choice of an eternal mate. He is the greatest!

Good News

2011-10-06T07:59:00.002-07:00

Spence reminded me in my excitement about General Conference that I forgot to share my latest health news. Since we went to Utah, I've had trouble swallowing again...not constantly, but at times. We went back and forth whether to do anything about it. We DID go to the GI doctor, and he was pretty reassuring about it--that my body is just getting used to the "new plumbing,"etc. However, he said that if we would feel better having an endoscopy just to check it out, that he would be happy to do that for us. We vascillated about it for a couple of weeks, and then decided to have one last Friday. I really wasn't nervous about it--figured we just needed to check it out, in case there was anything wrong. Well, it came out perfectly fine--no problems. The doctor didn't even need to do any dilating of my throat--which was a possibility. There is no scar tissue. The swallowing problem may happen just because where my old esophagus and new esophagus meet, there could be a pocket there...which might make it more difficult at times to swallow. Anyway, it was another thing to be grateful for...and we are. Every "little" thing is a victory. Have a good day!

General Conference--a Blessing from the Lord

2011-10-02T12:40:00.002-07:00

I just have to write today--it is GEneral Conference weekend, and we have one more session before it is over...and it has been truly inspiring and touching, and I have loved it. General Conference happens twice each year, in April and in October. It takes place in the Conference Center in Salt Lake City. We feel like our leaders are inspired of the Lord, and that they are giving us messages that He would want us to hear right now...just like the prophets in the Old Testament did. I have been particularly touched by the things they have said this weekend, and so I wanted to encourage any or all of you to take the time to read or listen to what they have said. They truly testify of Jesus Christ as our Savior, and of keeping the commandments and living like He did. They share experiences and very tender feelings, and I have been brought to tears many times this weekend. I am so grateful for their counsel. Their talks (both written and audio) can be listened to and read on lds.org--you go to General Conference. This is one of the reasons I am so grateful to be a member of the LDS Church--because of latter-day revelation and the peace and strength and guidance it gives me. I just wanted to share that with all of you today. May the Lord bless you in all that you do. Those talks are available probably Thursday of this week.

Thoughts and Feelings

2011-09-25T08:37:00.000-07:00

Ok--I have just written a post and then totally lost it. This is when I hate my blog..or hate computers or hate anything technical...which just lets me know I am still incompetent. I started this last night, and then Spence needed the computer...so here I am, trying to make it work again. Hopefully, I won't lose everything I write this time.

Last night was our annual woman's broadcast from Salt Lake City. It is always good--about an hour and a half of talks and music. It is always inspiring. But last night's particularly touched me. Dieter Utchdorf, who is a man who serves as a counselor to the president of our church (whom we consider a prophet), spoke. He has a very good way with the women--seems to be able to relate to them and understand them. He has a gift for that. He touched my spirit so much last night...and said things that I needed to hear. He talked about the forget-me-not flower and how it has been significant to him for many years. It has 5 petals, and so he had 5 different things that he counseled us to do. Since I can hear things and think they are really important, but then forget them almost immediately after, I will share FOUR of the 5 things that I remember that he said. He talked about being compassionate with ourselves. He said we often are compassionate with others' weaknesses, but are not with our own. He counseled us not to compare ourselves with others--such a problem that I think women especially have. He told us to be happy now--to not be looking for that elusive thing that is going to make us happy, but to be happy right now. He also talked about sacrifice--and how it is good to sacrifice, but sometimes we sacrifice for the wrong things. We need to make sure that what we sacrifice for is really the "better part." He concluded by affirming that our Father in Heaven knows us, loves us and cherishes us. Tears came very easily through that talk--I know that he was the instrument of my Father to talk to me...and I'm sure to many others. Afterwords I got a text from my daughter, Kelsey, who was also deeply touched by that talk. How grateful I am for inspired leaders, who are so in tune with Father in Heaven that they can give us the message that we need right then. I truly felt the love of Heavenly Father when he spoke. Now, if I can just remember that things he said, and use them in my daily life. :) Have a good Sabbath day. With my love, Louise

Happy Birthday Mom Price!

2011-09-20T21:44:00.002-07:00

If my wonderful mother-in-law had lived, she would be 90 years old today! She was an amazing woman and had an incredible impact on our whole family. So today I would like to pay some tribute to her and to the effect she has had on me. She was my cheerleader, and always believed in me. But that was a gift she gave to so many others, as well as me. She didn't let people feel sorry for themselves, but she encouraged them to do better and to improve themselves. She always made my children feel like they were special to her. They loved her very much. I remember one birthday for our daughter, Emily. She gave Emily 20 one-dollar bills, and with each bill that she handed her, she told Emily of a quality that she admired in her. It was such a wonderful thing to watch, and meant so much to Emily--definitely a treasured memory. She was cheerful and positive, and although I am not like her in all those qualities, I certainly can admire and appreciate them. She saw the good in people. She laughed easily, especially at herself, and she found fun in just about everything. So, today I pay tribute to her--may we all be a little more like Mom Price, a little more compassionate, less likely to judge, more inclusive of everyone, and more grateful for all the little things. She is an example for us all, even now, many years after she has passed from this life. I am thankful to be part of her eternal family, and know that for all of us, when we see her again, it will be a glorious reunion. Thanks, Mom Price, for all the memories, and for your tremendous example...and for just being YOU. Your legacy definitely lives on, and we still think of you often, and want to be more like you. With much love always, Louise and all the Price family

Fun Family Fotos!

2011-09-14T22:48:00.009-07:00

It is now over a week after I last wrote. I have just been editing some pictures, so I thought I would share them with you...and share some of my sweetest blessings. I am thankful for my family, so I'll show you some pictures of some of them. A lot of them come from our wedding weekend. I am still blown away by the fact of all that we could do after having such a horrendous year of bad health--the wedding, a new grandchild (and one more to come in just a little more than a month), a remodel of our home--wow, we have so many things to count our blessings about. The greatest thing is to be able to be with people and do things with them, and to enjoy my family...and have life come back to normal in most ways. My daughter, Kelsey, is doing wonderfully up at school at BYU--what a great experience it is for her! Brady, our youngest, is working on his Eagle Scout project--a big undertaking, but such a great chance for him to learn about being a leader.

I am taking a quilting class--such a fun diversion for me. :) I do love making things, and I am thankful I can take this. It is a class at my sister-in-law's store, and she has beautiful fabrics and fun classes. I love making something that doesn't come undone (that's the problem with cleaning and cooking--you just have to keep doing them, and someone is always making them come undone).

Well, now for the quick explanations of the pictures--of course, the 2 boys on top are the stars of our family--Logan, who is 2, and SJ, who is 4 months. Such cute boys! Then there are pictures of me and Spence with SJ. Logan is totally in love with his Aunt Kelsey--and loves to be with her. Brady misses his buddy, Kelsey, but is still doing well with high school activities and other things. (He still has his mom to tease, and he does it ALL the time!). The picture of Michael, Emily and SJ is from the wedding--they all looked so cute, especially SJ, with his bow-tie! Then the final picture is of Katie with her two nephews. We take a lot of pictures of those 2 boys, and enjoy our time with them. Well, there is a little catch-up of what we're doing. Have a great day! Love, Louise

Darn Dumping Problems

2011-09-06T22:14:00.001-07:00

I really can play the glad game most of the time these days--after all, look at me--I am like a totally new person from the person I was a year ago. However, there still are some remnants of my disease that aren't my favorite things. One is the infamous "dumping syndrome" that I've told you about before. I try to be so careful in what I eat and when I eat...but I still have these moments where I go into hot flash mode, and experience dizziness or lightheadedness. I have to be where a fan can blow cool air over me, and then I must eat something or I feel very weak and vulnerable. This happened to me Sunday night, and then again tonight. On Sunday it was our monthly fast Sunday, where we fast for 2 meals. I hadn't done it for months, but Spence and I talked about it, and decided that I could at least fast breakfast, and then eat lunch before I went to church. I don't think that settled very well with my body, because that night I had my typical reactions. Spence knows to move me into one of our bedrooms, where the bed is very close to the fan, and the cool air seems to help me "heal" faster. He brings me crackers, and usually something to drink to help get my blood sugar more normal again. It takes about 20-30 minutes, and then I am feeling more myself again. It happened to me tonight--I got dizzy as I was talking to a good friend on the phone. I get kind of weird too--kind of delirious (somewhat)--my son, Brady, lets me know when I start talking a little bit weird! My reactions are usually related to something I ate--either I eat too much sugar, or I eat sugar when I'm already full...or I just plain eat too much. I do wonder when I'll really figure this out--I may go for 2 weeks with no incident, and feel like I'm all better, but then something happens, and I throw off my eating patterns...and I'm having problems again. It really is so minor compared to other things I've had to deal with, but it is something I need to get better at so i can overcome it.

I am thankful I can do so many of my old normal things. Today I helped with the luncheon for a funeral--it is so nice to be able to help in that way. But even so, I find that things like that totally exhaust me. I came home, and was resting for a good part of the afternoon. But I am able to work out several times a week, and I am definitely getting stronger. So many things to be thankful for--just need to keep working on getting used to the "new plumbing" in my body!

We're Back! Take 2

2011-09-02T08:26:00.005-07:00

This is the second time I have done this post. I did one on August 31st, and never could get it to post--I did it on my laptop, and am hoping that doing it on my regular computer will work better. Otherwise, it will be a well-known fact that I am more than technologically challenged--I am deficient! So here goes the second time around...
Well, it is about time for me to write again. What a crazy August this has been! We spent last week in Utah getting Kelsey settled in for school. We had a lot of driving, and a lot of places to be...but we survived, and Kelsey is now in school, and hopefully learning to adjust to all the big changes in her life. Starting school is a huge transition, and our hearts and thoughts have been with her. BYU is a big campus, and there are a ton of people there. There is a lot of walking to classes, there is the adjustment of getting used to the altitude, so many things. It is an adjustment for us too--Kelsey has been such a big part of our family here in Arizona for so long, so we really miss her too. I will put some pictures in so you can see this great place where Kelsey lives.It is a dorm, but it is more like an apartment--they have a kitchen and living room, two bathrooms, and 3 bedrooms, and lots of storage. It is awesome, and it is brand-new.

We now have 3 of our 4 girls living in Utah. It was important to Kelsey and to us too for us to see the other members of our family. So on Wednesday, the day we were moving Kelsey into her dorm, we also drove to Logan (about 2 hours from Provo), to see Katie and Cody, our newlyweds. We had so much fun seeing them. They are living in a made-over barn (it is divided into 4 small apartments) which is so typical of them...but they have made it look really nice. I will also try to put a picture of them in their place. We brought them some of their wedding presents, and then we went out to Taco Bell--one of our favorite fast-food places! Then we drove to Clearfield where Emily livews--about 45 minutes form Logan. She drove down with us to Provo, so she could help Kelsey move in. Kelsey really wanted to be with her sisters--it made it a long and tiring day, but it was worth it to be with everyone. Kelsey just loves her sisters, and that was one of the reasons she wanted to go to school in Utah, so she could be closer to them. (By the way, we LOVE being with our daughters too!)

There were a lot of freshman orientation activities. We spent more time getting Kelsey settled in, and didn't get to all those activities...but she was very happy to get herself organized and settled in. She started school on Monday, and seems to be doing all right. We are thankful for phone calls, and texting, and even SKyping with her--all those things make her seem like she isn't that far away. :) During all this activity, I had some energy lapses--at those times, I would let the rest of my family bring Kelsey's stuff up to the 4th floor...and I would veg out on her couch or on her bed--I think sometimes I use my past sickness as my excuse to get out of work. My family still babies me at times...and I guess I like it, because I let them do it! :) Well, we are back home now, and are working on putting our house back together--still trying to recover after our remodel and the wedding.

OK--let me explains ome of these pictures. Spence, Cody and Katie are sitting in their living room on their brand-new couch. The LOVE wall is opposite the couch, and if you can tell, it has pictures of them on it. They have done well putting things up and displaying them in their house already. Then, the cute picture of Emily and Kelsey is in Kelsey's dorm room, in front of her closet. There are no doors on her closet--but we figure they planned it that way so maintenance wouldn't have to be fixing broken closet doors all the time. Aren't my girls so cute? I am going to put in one more picture of Kelsey's kitchen--it has so much storage and looks so modern. Anyway, now that you have plowed through this long post, you deserve to give yourself a treat, or do something fun. :) Thanks for being interested or at least for reading. Love you lots, Louise

We're Back!

2011-08-31T20:22:00.000-07:00

Too Many Good-Byes

2011-08-23T00:40:00.001-07:00

It is very late, and I know I shouldn't be writing in here...but I wanted to make one post before I leave for Utah in a few hours. It has been a whirlwind weekend--where we flew to Salt Lake City on Friday night--then drove up to Idaho Falls on Saturday morning with our daughter, Emily, and her husband and baby. We got so into talking that we missed where we were supposed to go...and had to backtrack and get on the right road--we lost about an hour doing that--crazy! We still got there in time to have lunch and then to be there for the open house that night. All went very well, and we enjoyed getting to meet friends and family of our new son-in-law, Cody. Everyone had nothing but nice things to say about Cody...so we are feeling pretty blessed to have him join our family! katie is very happy about that too. :) We drove back to Clearfield, where Emily lives, on Sunday morning...and went to Church with them, and then flew back on Sunday night. We saw some people we knew on the plane, so that made our trip even more enjoyable. BUT we are tired tonight--have been getting the car packed, and trying to get things ready to take our daughter, Kelsey, up to BYU. I say hello and good bye too often to too many of my kids...and it has put me in a pretty emotional state. Kelsey has to keep telling me not to cry...and that's not easy to do. I'm pretty emotional about her leaving. As many know, she has been my right arm for the past year, and my dear friend...so having her go is hard on me. But I am excited for her to have all these new experiences, and I hope that college is wonderful for her.

I have to say so many people have been so kind to her as she leaves,both from Church and from work. She has a lot of friends, and people see what a wonderful person she is (like many of us, SHE doesn't see how wonderful she is but the people around her do). It has been quite amazing to her when people bring her gifts or call her just to say good-by. She is a powerful influence for good, and doesn't even realize it. I am so proud to be her mother--she is a terrific person, and I love her very much. I am truly blessed as a mother.

Just your average Wednesday!

2011-08-17T06:28:00.002-07:00

It is Wednesday morning, and I really don't have anything earth-shattering to say...but thought I would write anyway. On Friday Spence and I will fly to Salt Lake City, and then drive up to Idaho Falls for Katie's open house in Idaho Falls (where Cody is from). We just found out last night that our daughter, Emily, and her family (Michael and baby SJ) are coming too...so we'll get to spend more time with them. That is always a treat!

We were feeling so grateful that my eating and dumping problems were getting better. However, I have had some dumping problems this week. On Sunday night I was in bed for most of the evening. Can you believe that is because I had one bite of a peanut butter brownie...and darn it, it was SO good! (But I ended up really paying for it). Last night I barely ate any dinner--I am a little paranoid again about having this problem. SIGH...the learning process continues.

I am back to taking Jodie (my oldest) to doctor's appointments again. It is better that I do it, since she missed at least 2 while I was recuperating. She has several, and it keeps me hopping to keep it all organized.

Next Tuesday we will leave for Utah to take our daughter, Kelsey, up to school. I am quite emotional about that whole thing. She has been such a friend to me, and SO incredibly helpful during my illness. I will miss her terribly. But I am excited for the experiences that she will have there. On Monday we went with her good friend, Erin Allred (and Erin's mother, who is MY good friend) to breakfast. We had a great time being together.

We are trying to put our house back together...but I am like ADD when it comes to working on the house. I can't focus on anything long enough to really get something done...and I need to. I can do things for a little while, then I'm bored...and on to something else. Well, here's to a more productive day! Happy days to you all, Louise

Some random thoughts

2011-08-14T09:30:00.002-07:00

It is Sunday morning. In just a few hours I will be giving a talk in our sacrament meeting about the importance of early-morning seminary (the class our high school students go to before they go to school). I am reading some talks from General Conference, and just wanted to share a quote from one of those talks.

It says, "If we place our confidence in the Lord, we will be sustained in all of our difficulties, our trials, and our afflictions. This promise from the Lord to His Saints does not imply that we will be exempt from sufferings or trials but that we will be sustained through them and that we will know that it is the Lord who has sustained us." What a blessing to know that the Lord will sustain us--support us through difficult times. Those times will not be taken away from us, but He will give us the strength to get through them. How thankful I am for that principle and for the reality of those words. I hope we all will feel the strength of the Lord in our lives, for He truly is the source of strength, comfort and hope. Happy Sabbath to all of you!

Woo Hoo--what a wedding!

2011-08-11T12:03:00.002-07:00

I have really been a slacker when it comes to writing on this blog--it is now becoming just a once a week event...hopefully I can improve on that. The wedding was fabulous--just about every detail worked out perfectly, and it was such a happy time with Katie. She was a beautiful and radiant bride--sounds corny, but that girl can really light up a room! She is so happy with Cody, and we are thrilled to have him in our family--he is such a nice guy. He comes from a very nice family, who all have tender hearts like he does. We had lots of family come from far away, and that meant a lot. The temple was a beautiful experience--Spence's dad, who is just months away from being 90, was able to perform the marriage...and that was so special. He is a great man, and has been a wonderful grandfather to our children. He has always has a special interest in Katie, because he is the one who discovered her amazing singing ability--he is very proud of that fact!

We had a luncheon after the temple ceremony and then a reception that night. As I get more pictures, I will probably post more of all the fun events of that day. My two sisters, Laura and Kathy, were here--and that always makes it special for me. Spence's two sisters who live out of town, Nancy and Rosemary, were also here...so we really had a celebration with both sides of our families.

Friday night we had a reception--there were so many people there, and that made us very happy. We had dancing, a chocolate fountain, and a photo booth...which was the hit of the night. So, all in all, we just had a wonderful time with everyone. Again, I just marvel that I just hit my one-year anniversary on August 9th of discovering that I had cancer...and here we were a year later...and able to do all that. Truly we have witnessed a miracle. I was blessed with lots of energy. What a blessing--and how happy we are for Katie and Cody!

Sleepless Nights--Wedding Worries!

2011-08-03T02:25:00.003-07:00

Hello everyone! Since I still have not downloaded any pictures from our trip to the beach or our preparations for the wedding, you will have to read a picture-less entry! As you can tell from the time I posted, I can't sleep. I have too many thoughts running through my head--to dos for before the big day (wedding on Friday), places I need to go, things I need to get done. My mind was just churning as I lay there, so I thought I could kill two birds with one stone--can't sleep, might as well blog! :)

We have had a few wedding mishaps in the past few days--very typical for this time of your life. Katie and Cody went through the temple last night--this was Katie's first time, and it truly was a delightful experience. She seemed to do very well, and was very into listening and learning. She was very happy to have the people there who could come...and it was such a sweet experience for her and me--truly one of those precious moments with a loved one. The temple workers who helped her were so sweet, and some of them were long-time dear friends. I'm so glad we could be there.

That was not an example of a mishap...but this was. On Monday night I went with Katie and Cody to have their wedding pictures taken--not a good idea to do on their wedding day, since it will be the middle of the day and very hot. I stopped on the way home to put gas in my car. As I was throwing away garbage from my car, I inadvertently threw away my charge card also...so later that evening Spence drove back to Mesa to look through the garbage and find my card...which miraculously he DID! He found it on the ground. We felt very blessed. He brought it home, put it on the kitchen counter, and lo and behold, we couldn't find it later. I spent a lot of time looking for that dumb card, but then our cleaning ladies found it...and so all was well...until I lose the next thing or forget some important detail (that I think is so important, but really isn't in the big scheme of things!)

The thing that is so amazing about this August, is that it was exactly a year ago (I think on the 9th) that I found out I had cancer. Isn't it amazing how well I feel just a year later? I am cancer-free,I can work out,I can do just about anything, as long as I take a few well-placed rests(!), and I can eat. WOW--I have been so blessed, so I guess some minor wedding mishaps are bound to happen...and really don't matter nearly as much as the fact that I am here to enjoy them and to experience them. I am truly a blessed person.

2011-07-26T08:50:00.004-07:00

Wow--it's been quite a while since I wrote! I am posting a picture of Jodie getting her award, and also a picture of me and my girls at the shower that was given for Katie, who gets married in just over a week. I should post pictures of us at the beach--that's where we are right now, but once I get those downloaded, I will do that. It is WONDERFUL to be here at the beach--it is cool and relaxing. If you lived in San Clemente, you would never need to go on vacation--life is pretty much perfect right here! We have most of our kids here--but not our son, Brian, and his wife, Keri, and their son, Logan...so we are having a lot of fun being together. We spend as much time as possible at the beach--and read, and play games. Last night we watched the movie, "Little Rascals," and really enjoyed that. :)Cody, who is marrying our Katie, is fitting in well--and especially makes our youngest, Brady, happy, because he is always willing to play games. (A definite plus in Brady's book!)

I felt prompted to write in here again--I guess I've been on vacation mode, and haven't done many of my normal things. I was just reading the blog of friends of ours who are mission president in Sendai, Japan. It is very heart wrenching to read of their experiences and to see the devastation that happened with the tsunami and earthquake. I am thankful they are keeping such a good record, and sharing that with the rest of us. They (the missionaries) are giving a lot of service to the people, and that amounts to a lot of work with the fisherman, trying to untangle their nets, which is the source of their livelihood. And here I sit, basking in the sun and playing in the ocean--it is pretty humbling when you get a glimpse of what people have gone through.

Take care, and I'll write again sooner this time. :) Love to all, Louise

What an Evening!

2011-07-16T09:36:00.001-07:00

What a fun night this was--I just need to share it. Actually I wrote this on Friday night, but couldn't get it to post until this morning (Saturday). Tonight was Jodie's spring formal--can't quite figure out why it is spring in the middle of summer? But oh well. It was supposed to be a 50's theme, and all the handicapped adults that are involved in different programs were there. I love to watch them at a party--they are so uninhibited, and so full of joy--they just have a great time! If they feel like dancing, they just get up and dance--they might have a partner, but they also might not. It is like watching people with pure joy--they are just having a good time! They gave out some awards. Jodie is part of a work enclave, where several of mentally challenged adults (I guess I can use the politically correct term!) work at a certain job site. For Jodie, her enclave works at the local hospital, and their main job is to shred papers. For this year Jodie was chosen as employee of the year, mostly from her work at our local grocery store, Fry's, but also for how she has been at the hospital. We were told about it beforehand--it was a suprise to her, so my daughter, Kelsey, and I went to the dance. We didn't want her to know we were there, so if she looked our way, we would look down or away...just so she wouldn't see us! It was fun to do that with Kelse. We waited about an hour for Jodie to get there, but finally she got her award. It was the cutest thing to see her get that--she was surprised and so pleased, and she couldn't stop smiling. She was thrilled that I was there, and even more thrilled to see Kelsey. We stayed after she got the award, and danced to "Rocking Robin" with her--she couldn't have been happier. It was fun to be there, to see her honored, and just to see how happy those people are. What a lesson we could learn from all of them--to just enjoy life in the moment, and dance with pure joy! Happy Saturday to you all!

Crazy Summer Days

2011-07-14T11:35:00.003-07:00

Summer can be such a crazy time! Your time is so fragmented, and there are non-stop interruptions. It's hard to get any kind of schedule going...and then to add on top of that, a wedding and a remodel, and it's kind of "over the top!" I decided this morning that I am definitely in "the thick of thin things"--spending a lot of time and energy on things that are really pretty unimportant in the "grand scheme" of things. I worry about the color of my couch, or if my new hardwood floor is getting scratched, or if the envelopes for the wedding look just right---very much so the "thick of thin things." I get frustrated about things that really don't matter...so I hope that today I can focus on more meaningful things, but that may not happen.

I was just naming my blessings, when my computer decided to blot everything out that I have written. No wonder I feel frustrated these days--it seems like if something is going to go wrong, it DOES! I AM thankful we have the means to do this remodel...even if not being able to find a pan to cook in, or beaters for our hand mixer, keeps me from doing fairly "normal" things. I am thankful that all our children will be here for our upcoming wedding. I am especially thankful today for my sisters, who show me constant love and support, even when I'm stressing about unimportant things.

I am thankful for my health--when I think of where I was a year ago, and see how far I've come, I have MUCH to be thankful for. It is good to be able to eat, and to swallow, and to exercise, and to be able to do things again. I have always been able to swim easily, and this summer it has been a challenge. I am still trying to get stronger, and I saw that my weak arms really affected my ability to swim. However, that is getting better too...and I am swimming more.So I DO have much to be grateful for--things that matter a whole lot more than some of the other things that seem to be preoccupying my mind so much lately. So that's just a short update today on what is happening. I hope you can have good days too--much love, Louise

We love our Granddad!!

2011-07-08T08:32:00.008-07:00

We are still in the middle of a mess--wow, remodels are incredibly crazy, and you certainly feel totally disorganized. I just wanted to express my thanks for Spence, who has done so much--it has not been easy for him, and the stress is taking its toll on all of us. And yet, whenever he says a prayer with me, he reminds me of how thankful we should be for my miraculous recovery, and all the blessings of health that I've had in the last year. He seems to try to help me to regain perspective, and to not get caught up in the "thick of thin things"--an easy thing to do when you're dealing with STUFF. So today we get carpet...and I need to get off this computer. However, I am going to try to post a few pictures...and then call it a day, as far as posting goes. No matter what goes on in our life, it is so easy to get caught up in things that really don't matter, and forget those things that really DO matter.

The pictures I am going to try to post are of my father-in-law, Reed Price, who is a real favorite of my kids. They love him, and when we were in Utah for my nephew's wedding, all my girls wanted to be sure to get a picture of them with Granddad. What a legacy and example he has set for all of them! The top picture is of Emily, who wanted a 4-generation picture--she has always been a real favorite of her Granddad's. The next picture is of Kelsey, who is so cute with her granddad, and always makes a definite point of making him feel special. The last one is of Katie. Her granddad takes special pride in the fact that he "discovered" Katie's musical talent, and encouraged us and her to improve upon it. He is probably the biggest fan of her singing. They all feel very special towards their wonderful granddad. What a blessing our families can be!! :)

July Update

2011-07-05T16:58:00.002-07:00

Hello everyone.
My internet is not working on my laptop, and that's where most of my pictures are. I will try again to import a picture--but my luck hasn't been so great lately! How are you? And how was your 4th of July? We are pretty much into picking up, putting away, and throwing away stuff...so we didn't play much on the 4th. However, we did have a fun evening--a late dinner, that was super traditional--hamburgers, hot dogs, potato salad, fruit salad, corn, chips and pop. It was delicious. Then we went swimming, and watched fireworks from the wall by our pool. It was great not to have to go anywhere--it is such a pain to wait in a parking lot forever after watching fireworks...which we don't have to do when we watch from home. We usually watch from our roof, but could see just fine from the wall. Our pool is pretty warm (Phoenix in the summer), but still it was refreshing to be outside, and to have gone swimming. I am easing back into the swimming scene. I have always been able to swim lots of laps fairly easily. WIth the soreness in my arms, it has been more of an adjustment this year to swimming...but I am trying to build up strength again.

I have had some dumping problems lately, and that has been frustrating to me. Still, it is a learning process. First of all, I just can't eat too much. Then I need to lie down after I eat, and let everything settle before it heads for my intestines. I also tasted some of the yummiest ever ice cream on Saturday nigth. I loved it, and had just a spoonful...but loved it so much that I asked for another spoonful. I paid for that for the rest of the night, and felt light-headed and like I was having a diabetic attack. Both Spence and Brady took super good care of me, and helped me get through it all. SIGH...I just can't eat those sweets, or just in very tiny increments.

I am also sure that I have ADD. I can't focus on anything for a long period of time. I have to "mix things up," or I go stir crazy. With the wedding and the remodel, I find myself pulled in several directions at once. I have to change things up, just so that one thing doesn't drive me crazy! :)Anyway, that's an update from here. Hopefully next time, there will be a picture.

Crazy into this remodel!

2011-07-02T16:21:00.002-07:00

I am giving myself a break today, since this remodel stuff is driving me crazy!! It is the hardest thing to try to sort through all the stuff you've accumulated for years and years...and try to discard things that you've kept forever. At the same time, I am also working on updating names on the wedding list for my daughter, Katie--and trying to get a hold of people and find out the address changes is another cause for stress. My study has been the stuffing place for everything you can think of...and it's amazing how incredibly messy a place can become.

It is also a very nostalgic time for me.I get quite emotional having to part with things. Surprising to me, the most emotional part for me has been throwing away all the materials I accumulated when I was an early-morning seminary teacher for the high school kids in my church. I did it for 3 years about 3 years ago. I would teach every day about 10-15 teenage kids before they went to high school--so anywhere between 6 and 7 in the morning. It took a lot of preparation, and it was always a challenge, since the kids would have rather been home, asleep. But as I went through those materials, I found myself tearing up quickly, for it brought back so many tender memories...and when you invest yourself in something that time-consuming, it becomes a very big and important part of your life. It was wrenching for me to throw those things away, and I hope that someday I might get the chance to teach like that again. How grateful I am for the opportunities that I've had in my life to teach people about the Gospel of Jesus Christ and about the principles that I hold so dear to me. So, in spite of some of the headaches that this remodel is causing, it is also a reminder of some of my most favorite memories.

I am enclosing a picture of me with my baby, SJ--someone requested that I put a picture of me with him onto my blog. I haven't done that for a while. Have a happy Sunday, and a wonderful 4th of July. With lots of love, Louise Well, next time will have to have a picture--I can't make it work this time.

Fabulous Doctors' Reports!

2011-06-24T07:26:00.004-07:00

Hello everyone...or anyone who is still reading. You can spend tons of time reading blogs, and never getting anything else done...so I totally understand if you don't even read this. However, I did want to report that I went to my GI doctor and to the surgeon this week...and both were so happy to report that I am doing GREAT! It was the last appointment we'll have with the surgeon...unless more surgery comes up sometime in the future (you never know what the future will bring!), and he was just so pleased with the way everything went. Basically, it all started when the radiation and chemo took care of that tumor. The surgery also went really well, and from the pet scan and the endoscopy, things are looking clear and good. Both said it couldn't have gone better. So I am extremely thankful to be where I am today...and not where I was a year ago--not knowing what was going on, but wondering why I couldn't swallow anything. Thank heavens for modern medicine, for competent doctors, for the great power of faith and prayer, and for priesthood blessings--all of them worked together to make me well, and I am very grateful.

I am also able to do better at exercising. I have been a little more consistent with taking my dog on walks...and I have been pretty faithful in working out at the cancer center practically every day. For quite a while, my arm really hurt--we couldn't figure out why, but now think that it had atrophied while I was recovering. After working out and working specifically on that arm, it has definitely improved. I can move it without it hurting, and I am getting stronger. So, another reason to be thankful!

Our remodel is a MESS! I've got to do something today to pick things up--it's just where do you put them when you pick them up? We now have tile in our bathrooms, pantry and utility room. We are totally into paper goods, since we have no dishwasher and only one bathroom with a sink in it. It makes you be creative...or just give up and go out to eat! It is also very HOT right now in Arizona--but we did get new air conditioning units...and we are certainly using them! Well, that is an update on me and on us. Things are looking good, and we are grateful for all the good results and positive reports. Thanks for your friendships--they mean the world to me! Love, Louise

Happy Father's Day!

2011-06-18T23:11:00.009-07:00

Happy Father's Day to all you fathers out there! I hope you have a great Sunday. I will add some pictures of some of our kids--the latest ones I don't have downloaded, and those would actually be more appropriate for Father's Day, but you'll just have to wait until the next entry, after I have downloaded and edited them. we just got back late this afternoon from Utah (AGAIN!) where my nephew, Jamey Price, was married. What a wonderful time we had--it was so fun to be with Jamey and his terrific family. I was so impressed by all of them--they are the greatest combinations of fun and spirituality. You laugh almost constantly while you are with them, but they are darn good people too. I'm so thankful to be related to them. It was so fun to see other members of Spence's big extended Price family also. We were with his dad and Marge, his wife--and we had a good time being with them too.

We also got early Father's Day celebrations with our kids up there--Emily and Michael, and their baby, SJ, and with Katie and Kelsey. Brady got home from Scout camp today, and he's told us a lot about that. Our kids really love their dad and appreciate the good man he is--we had an early Father's Day breakfast this morning in Utah with Emily and Kelsey--SOOO fun! (again, pictures will come soon!)

Traveling isn't always easy for me, but I am amazed at my increase of energy...and am very grateful. I still have my moments, but I can go for longer periods of time, and do more. I was with my niece, Shelby, who is also a cancer survivor--and it made me very grateful to be with her and with her 5 kids--another one of the Lord's tender mercies to both of us.

Writing in journals or blogs is not Spence's thing, but on this Father's Day Eve, I would say he is very grateful for the family he has. He is so cute with this new baby, SJ, and he misses seeing his other grandson, Logan. He loves his kids, and has been so patient and loving with them over the years--they are very lucky to have him for their dad. He is very supportive of our whole family. So I'll include a few pictures, and tell you who they are. Ok--this is the rundown. The top picture is of 3 of my 4 girls--Emily, Kelsey and katie. They were checking out pictures that had been taken of Katie and her fiance, Cody. Then there is a picture of Brady, who turns 14 on Father's Day, and Baby SJ. Then the last one is of Spence and SJ--that's the info on the pictures.

Make sure you tell all the fathers in your lives how much you love them, and how thankful you are for their examples in your lives. (it may not be your own father, but many men are like fathers to many of us--how grateful we should be for them too!)Hooray for fathers, and for beautiful weddings and for families! :)

Loneliness is no fun!

2011-06-13T10:15:00.002-07:00

I had an experience this weekend that gave me just a small taste of how it feels to be alone...and it is NO FUN! My husband took our son to Scout camp, and my daughter is up in Utah with her sister...so Saturday I was all by myself. I was so bored--life is a lot more fun when you have someone to share it with. I thought I would get so much done, and be super productive, but I was just LONELY. It was hard not to have anyone here, and instead of feeling motivated, I just missed my people. It was good for me to realize how many lonely people there are in the world--who are alone every night and who face an empty house every day. My heart really went out to the many friends I have who are widows or have gone through divorces, and who face those empty moments so often. It is hard. I was very glad when my husband got home last night, and when my older daughter, Jodie, came to go to Church with me. I hope that I will be more mindful of people who are alone, and who have those feelings often. It made me grateful for my family, and for the majority of time when I am not alone. So may our Father bless all of you who may be lonely, and may He help all of us to be aware of the lonely people in our lives. Have a good one.

Update from home

2011-06-09T14:08:00.002-07:00

It's been nearly a week since I wrote in here. We had a very nice time in Utah, although we only had maybe 2 days of pretty decent weather. It's still fairly cool up there, but it is so much fun to be with our kids. The blessing for baby SJ went really well. Our son-in-law, Michael, did a great job on giving the blessing. Michael is an amazing person, and one of my all-time favorites. :) Katie and her fiance, Cody, came down and spent Sunday with us too. It was great to have so many of us together. It was hard for Brady, our youngest, to come home--he enjoys being with his older siblings so much...and he loves playing basketball with Michael.

We came home to our torn-up house. Even though everything is out of place, we are excited about how it's going to look. We have raised the ceiling in our kitchen, and that makes everything seem roomier. The tile has also been torn out, and will be replaced mostly by wood floors. We are getting new appliances, and got a great deal on a new oven, microwave, and refrigerator. We feel so lucky to be getting all these things.

Meanwhile, we are trying to get things ready for Katie's wedding. It is hard to do a wedding long-distance, but we've got an amazing friend, Terri Flaherty, who is helping us with the wedding and our house--she is fabulous! I hope we can pull all of this together before the beginning of August.

Some of you have commented on the amount of traveling I am doing--it is pretty amazing. (and sometimes is hard with some of my ongoing health issues). On the whole, I am doing well...but I still have to be careful. I still have problems with the dumping syndrome--I've got to watch the consumption of sweets, and also be careful about not eating too much period. We went out to dinner at a great place in Utah, but I ate too much, and then I had to lay down. Otherwise, I get hot, delirious, faint and kind of crazy--like I am so disoriented. One night at Emily's, I had an "episode" where I wasn't even sure where I was. Spence stayed right by my side, and got me up into her hallway, where a fan could blow on me. With the help of some Gatorade and crackers, I was able to get feeling better in about a half hour.It's almost like I have a diabetic reaction. I just need to rest after eating, and try to listen to my body before it gets to that point. I have decided that I have those episodes more when Spence is around--he is so attentive, and I know I'll get total care if he's around. He is very reassuring to me when I'm going through that. It doesn't happen often, but it is kind of unnerving when it DOES happen. We are going back to Utah in a week for the wedding of our nephew. Then I'm home until we go to the beach at the end of July. Anyway, that is the latest update. I hope you all are doing well. With all my love, Louise

Hanging out in Utah

2011-06-03T22:04:00.002-07:00

Spence and I are up here in Utah with Emily. We also have Brady and Kelsey with us. We are here for the baby's blessing which will take place on Sunday. While we are here, they are going to have a baby shower for Emily tomorrow, and we are going to watch as another daughter, Kelsey, takes pictures for the wedding invitations for Katie. It's a busy family time. I know it is hectic for Emily to have family here, and to have to take care of her brand-new baby--she and Michael are nice to let us come invade. It is still chilly up here--pretty sunny days, but still kind of cool. Of course, we come from our hot desert, so practically anything would seem cool to us. :)

We had a tragic thing happen to a friend of ours yesterday. Jerry Shelley, who is a member of our LDS ward, was shot in Yuma. He was a divorce lawyer, and was shot by a man whose divorce he (Jerry) had worked on a few years ago. The man who shot him went on a shooting spree where he killed 6 people, including himself. Jerry and his wife were teachers for our son when he was still in the Church's childrens' organization (ends when the children turn 12), and Brady just loved him. He was a kind, good man, and it is such a loss to have had this happened. It is so senseless, and so random, and such a horrible tragedy. It is things like this that are so hard to understand. We are praying for his good wife, Nancy, and for their children. What a terrible loss. Life is so fragile, especially when there are people like this killer who harbor such hate and revenge. Life is so crazy at times. Again, another reminder that we need to treasure each day we have with loved ones.

In a Mess!

2011-06-01T18:41:00.005-07:00

I am on my way back up to Utah. Our little baby boy, SJ, is getting blessed this Sunday, and we are going up for it. Brady and Kelsey are coming too...and then Kelsey is staying for the month of June to help Emily with SJ. We ar excited to go--however, the weather is STILL cold up there. When is summer actually going to come to Utah? Katie, who is in Logan, said it snowed there a couple of days ago--crazy!

It has been a hectic couple of days for us. We are getting ready to do some remodeling, and it has forced us to empty cupboards and drawers. We need to do this more often--we have accumulated SO MUCH junk! It has been a full-time job, plus there have been errands to run--dentist appointments, basketball camp, etc. I am worn out. Kelsey, who has always been the best about watching out for me, makes sure that I take rests, and don't try to keep going. It gets to be a lot. The demolition on our kitchen starts tomorrow--so things should look pretty different when we get back. To add to the craziness, our dog has been acting strangely--like he is going through some trauma. i can identify--tonight I couldn't find any potholders so I dropped a bunch of the casserole on the floor of the oven. I fell apart when I did that. How am I supposed to cook when I can't find pans, or towels or potholders? I know what you're all thinking--perfect excuse to eat out every night! Anyway, somehow we'll get this all done...and we'll be ready, and our house will be a disaster...and hopefully all this work will be done before the wedding.

I will post another picture--I have been taking so many lately, that I need to share them. This is one (maybe two) of Kelsey and Brady at their graduations. They are cute kids, and really have been great helps with all this chaos going on here. How am I going to survive June without Kelsey to help out? :)I'm not sure I can let her go to college in the fall either. She is my right hand--helps with everything!

Thanks for Memorial Day

2011-05-29T18:52:00.004-07:00

This morning I watched the Mormon Tabernacle Choir do their weekly broadcast. It was about Memorial Day, and the gratitude we should feel for those who have sacrificed their lives to preserve our freedom. I was touched by the words spoken and the music sung, and need to express my thankfulness for the many men and women who have given their all so I can enjoy the freedoms that I do have.

I also wanted to give a health update--I have been so busy talking about babies and graduations, that I need to let you know my progress health-wise also. :) I went to my oncologist this week. He was thrilled about my positive pet scan and blood work...and I have now graduated to seeing him every TWO months rather than every month. It will be nice to have one less doctor's appointment each month. I don't even have to see him until after Katie's wedding in August! I am able to eat more, although today I ate TWO cookies and could feel the effects for a while afterwards. (I have to be very careful about the amount of refined sugar that I eat) I have been working out at the cancer work-out center, and I am glad to do that. I am going to try to walk my dog more often--for the exercise, but also so my dog gets out once in a while!

I will post a couple of pictures of Kelsey's graduation from high school.The one picture of our family shows her brother, Brady, and her oldest sister, Jodie, and, of course, her dad! Kelsey was a darling graduate, and had a great time at her all-night party. I am proud of her for graduating and also for getting accepted to BYU, where she will start in the fall. She's done great, and I know she will do many good things in the future--she is a great girl, and I love her very much. Have a happy and thankful Memorial Day!

Celebrating Sharie

2011-05-27T09:41:00.004-07:00

I still have pictures to post of graduation and the celebrations that went with it...but today is my dear friend, Sharie Johnson's birthday...and I wanted to pay tribute to her. She got me through one of the toughest weeks of my treatments in the fall...and then came and celebrated life with me this spring. She has been my friend since FOURTH grade!! That's pretty unbelievable, and she has been the best friend ever. She is not one to give a lot of advice, so when she DOES give some advice, you sit up and listen--she is very wise. It is her birthday today, and because I am such a slacker, I haven't even sent her a card or a present yet...so I wanted to dedicate my blog to her. People come and go in our lives, and then there are some that make all the difference in our worlds. Sharie is that person to me. She is kind and gentle and very Christ-like in all that she does. She touches peoples' lives and makes all who know her want to be better. I always come away from being with her, hoping that I can be that much better and sweeter. She is accepting of everyone, and finds the good in people. She has been a supporter of me all my life, and was the one who brought the Gospel of Jesus Christ to me. How grateful I am for her, and for the powerful influence she is in my life. My children call her "Aunt Sharie," and rightfully so--she has always loved and cared for them too. I hope on this day, HER day, I can be that kinder and gentler person. Thank you, Sharie, for all you are, and for the shining light you are in my life. I love you so very much. I am including pictures of Sharie and me--she just radiates goodness! Love to all, Louise

The End of School

2011-05-23T21:29:00.004-07:00

This is an entry about my daughter, Kelsey. She does not like to have too much attention drawn to her, but she is ending her high school career, and it is a time of much nostalgia for me--she is ready to be "outta there," but I am having more tender feelings.

Last night we went to her seminary graduation. High schoolers in our church go to a church class every day of the school year. It's called seminary. When there aren't many LDS kids in the school, the kids go to early-morning seminary, where they are taught for about 45 minutes each morning before school starts. Kelsey did this for all 4 years of high school, and it would start about 6:30 or 7:00 each day. (depending on when school starts). They studied a different book of scripture every year. Her first year I was her seminary teacher, and maybe that is why seminary graduation was extra tender for me. The music got to me, and the fact that several of her Church friends also graduated just made it very meaningful to me. I love many of them, and the thought that they will all be taking off for school, and then going on missions and different things that are coming up for them, really got to me...and made me quite emotional. Even though high school has lots of ups and downs with friends, I still get quite attached to my kids' friends. Last night was particularly touching to me. Again, the words of a song come to my mind: "Each life that touches ours for good Reflects Thine own great mercy, Lord." How thankful I am for my dear friends and for people who have been my children's friends. There isn't much joy in life without the love and caring of good people. I am glad that my children's friends can be MY friends as well. It was a tender night for me. I am putting some pictures in of that event. ENJOY!

Going Home

2011-05-18T09:09:00.004-07:00

I just wrote a whole post, and then lost it. I still deal with technological challenges. I will try to recreate what I just wrote. As you can tell from my title, I am going home today. I need to go back to the "real world," and not just play grandma. It has been such a wonderful experience to be here with Emily, Michael and their precious baby boy. He is just so sweet, and really does well. He does cry (he is a baby after all), but can be calmed down quite easily...and mostly just cries if he is hungry or has a messy diaper. He is very alert, and is just SOOO cute! He reminds me so much of Emily as a baby--and everyone who sees him thinks he looks like her. It has been such a great experience to be here in their home--there is such a sweet and loving spirit in here, and I am constantly learning from their examples. I have enjoyed helping out--even doing dishes in someone else's kitchen is fun! Last night SJ sat in his swing and watched me do the dishes while his mom took a little nap--how fun was that! Michael is a very attentive and loving husband and father--mixed in with his sense of fun also. I have just been so impressed with what a sweet family this is. They have had several visitors, and this baby is certainly not lacking for cute boy outfits! I have called this my "baby slumber party". We stay up late with the baby, and then sleep in--it's been so much fun. I hate to leave, but we will see him and them in a few weeks when we come back for his blessing. I am so proud of Emily and the wonderful, caring mother she is. She has always loved babies, but to see her with her own baby is a very sweet and touching thing. I am so grateful that I could feel well enough to be here, and to do a few things to help. When I heard they were expecting, I was in the middle of all my cancer treatments--and wondered if I would be able to come and help. So I feel very blessed to be here, and to have shared in these first days of little SJ's life. Truly again Heavenly Father has blessed me. I am going to include a few pictures, just because I am so biased about this baby, and this family whom I love so much.

Truly a Day of Thanks

2011-05-14T08:22:00.003-07:00

Hello, It has been a while since i wrote. What an eventful week this has been! I am posting some pictures of our new baby, Spencer Christopher, who will be known as SJ! What a darling, sweet little baby he is. How thankful I am that I can be up here in Utah with him, Emily and Michael. I could post forever about all the cute, sweet things we have experienced...but let me just say how thankful I am for him, and for my daughter, Emily, who has just been a trooper through all of this. She had a difficult labor and has been pretty sore this week. But her love for this baby just shines through...and it is a privilege to be here with her and Michael. I love them all, and am so proud of them. They will be terrific parents--this baby is very lucky to come into this home.

In all the hoopla of having SJ arrive, I have been a little less expressive about my great thanks for the blessings of my Father to me, health-wise. It is humbling to know that I am totally clear of any cancer right now--what a tribute to the faith and prayers of so many of you. I am thankful for the mercy of a loving Father to me, and for the power of the priesthood which has blessed me incredibly through this. My healing has truly been one of the "tender mercies" of the Lord. The power of my own prayers and those of my family have been a strength beyond measure. My son, Brady, has always been incredibly positive about how things would turn out. How thankful I am for his ever-cheerful and encouraging attitude. He just KNEW I would get better. My sister, Laura, has a friend who has been battling cancer for years. Her attitude is what mine needs to be (and in fact, would be good for all of us)--where she lives life to the fullest, and makes every day count. When I found out that Emily was pregnant, I just hoped with all my heart that I would be well enough to come be with her and hopefully offer some help. I feel ever so grateful that my Father in heaven has granted me that blessing.

I want to share a couple of pictures with you. There is one with Emily and her cousin, Katherine Allen Mitchell. They have been friends all their lives...so this picture is particularly poignant to me. (In fact, I cried when I took it). My heart is filled with gratitude this morning. This day is a gift--may it be that way for all of you too. I love you very much, Louise

Shout Hooray!

2011-05-09T22:35:00.004-07:00

I have got two very big reasons to shout HOORAY!! We have great news to share. First of all, several of you have been asking about the results of my pet scan. Again, the news "couldn't be better." We talked to the nurse in our GI doctor's office today, and she said that everything was clear--that there is no sign of cancer. The endoscopy showed that my stomach and intestine were perfectly clear. Isn't that the most terrific news? We feel so incredibly grateful to our Father in Heaven for His merciful answer to our prayers. WOW--we are so fortunate. Spence's colonoscopy also showed good results, so we feel very blessed. The news just couldn't be any better. With cancer treatment, you have to just count your blessings along the way--you don't know what might be coming "around the bend," but we are ever so grateful right now. Thanks again a million times for your prayers and love and concern. We have certain people in our life who are just always aware of what is going on, and so quick to show their concern. Bless you all for caring.

The second reason we have to rejoice is the surprise early birth of our second grandchild--born on Mother's Day. Our daughter, Emily, was due on May 25th, but her baby decided to make her a mother on Mother's Day itself! She had a baby boy, who they have named Spencer Christopher (what an honor for Spence to have another grandson named after him)Johnson, and they are going to call him SJ! We are thrilled that he came, and that he seems to be doing well. We fly up to Utah in the morning, and can't wait to meet him, and to see Emily and Michael. So we feel very richly blessed right now--and so very thankful for the goodness of our Heavenly Father to our family. I am going to try to post a picture of him so you can see--and of Emily too. She looks darn good for just having a baby! She's always been photogenic, even after delivering a baby. :) Love to all, Louise

Friday's Update

2011-05-06T10:03:00.003-07:00

It is Friday, and so we have done all our medical things this week. Except for taking blood for me which happens later today. As I've said, what would I do for entertainment if I didn't have medical appointments? On Wednesday I had my pet scan. Of course, we don't have the results yet, but hope that they will be good ones. Then Spence went to do a colonoscopy yesterday. It is pretty pathetic that the nurses all recognized us from being there a week earlier to do my endoscopy. We're getting to be too familiar to everyone at the hospital. When you're on a first-name basis, it means you've been there too much. The pet scan went fine--since they move you in and out of the tube, you don't have quite the same claustrophobic feelings that you might have if you just had to be in there for 20 minutes without moving.

I have been more diligent in working out. I have had quite a bit of pain in my upper arms and shoulders--probably because of months of little use. So my "trainers" are working on me building muscle strength and trying to loosen up those muscles. I feel like a wimp when I can hardly raise my arms over my head.

I had an experience last night that was a graphic example (but small) of dumping syndrome. Kelsey brought home a blizzard from Dairy Queen for Brady. I literally had 2 spoonfuls of that, and still had a reaction--got hot, sweaty, tired and weak. It lasted for just a few minutes, but I guess all this stuff about sugar for me is a real thing. I better really be careful about eating that stuff--I have to admit, I also had had a couple of Easter M&M's, so that probably didn't help. Back to the fruits and veggies--SIGH...anyway, I hope all you mothers out there have a great Mother's Day. There is nothing quite like a mother. My mother has been gone for quite a while now, and I miss her--and miss her mothering. So don't procrastinate telling your mother how much she means to you. It will mean so much to HER. Love you all, Louise

Not looking forward to another test

2011-05-04T07:57:00.003-07:00

I talk a good story, and now that I'm awake, I am doing better. But fear got the best of me last night--and worries about this pet scan actually kept me awake during the night. I RARELY have problems sleeping, but last night was different. Even though everything else has looked good, I still fear having another test that could show that I have cancer, and then waiting for the results. I am thankful for the sun coming up, and things DO look brighter. There is nothing I can do now about the test...so I am going to enjoy my morning and then head over to the hospital for the test. Then we'll play the waiting game, and we'll just hope for the best. :) As I've said many times before, this is all part of the "process." Sometimes I just don't want to be reminded that this is an ongoing thing--I would just like it all to end. We don't usually get to "call the shots" that way! OH WELL. Have a good day. Love you, Louise

Diet Dilemna

2011-05-03T14:52:00.003-07:00

Thanks to Spence for informing you about my dumping syndrome. It was such an amazing thing to have the nutritionist tell us so much. I think Spence definitely is getting his honorary doctor's degree!!

As Spence told you, it makes things much clearer. What we couldn't believe is how all the symptoms of dumping syndrome were symptoms that I've had! I still need to read all the info she gave us...but things started making sense after talking to her. However, it still is a challenge to figure out what to eat. Let me try to explain. I'll use Gatorade as my example. When I was having my C-Dif problems, Gatorade was a great help in restoring electrolytes to my system. I was first on regular Gatorade, but then learned about G2, Gatorade with less sugar...so i changed over to that. Then, when I was trying to add more calories to my diet to help gain weight, I went BACK to normal Gatorade, which has more sugar in it. After talking to Terry, our nutritionist, I knew that I shouldn't be drinking stuff with that much sugar in it, so now I'm back to the G2 stuff! The challenge is still getting the calories in, without adding the sugar. To complicate things a little more, I tend to have high cholesterol. I have been on medicine for that, which may be causing me to have some random pains in my leg (and at times, in my shoulder). Some of the things I am told to eat (to add more calories) are more butter, mayonnaise, gravies, etc. which are not good for cholesterol...so you can see why all of this causes me to be in somewhat of a quandry! I wish medicines didn't have side effects, and that you didn't have to worry about how one medicine can affect another. I also wish that there were more calories in healthy foods, and less in all the junky ones! What can I say? I am encouraged to learn about dumping syndrome, and as soon as I figure out what I can really eat, things will be much better. Forget the doctors--we're going straight to the nutritionist--she seems to really know what she's talking about!!

Tomorrow is the pet scan. They told me that it will take about 2 hours. I can't read during that time, so I'll bring my ipod, and just listen to music. Just ask Spence--he'll tell you: I'll be asleep for that 2 hours!! This pet scan will show if there is any trace of cancer in my body right now. I'm so thankful I can have doctor's appointments--how would I fill my days if I couldn't fill them by spending time with my doctors? I certainly know how to have fun. Have a great day--keep sending those good thoughts. :)

Haven't you always been told that sweets were bad for you??

2011-04-30T22:44:00.003-07:00

I am a guest blogger tonight (Spence) because Louise thinks I'm better at explaining technical medical situations. Louise has a new medical situation that will effect her eating habits from now on. These new eating habits will keep her feeling well and hopefully will stabilize her weight a bit. It better because otherwise I can't afford her anymore. She has had two complete wardrobe changes since Christmas. She has lost so much weight that she has to give away all of her new clothes every two months and buy new smaller ones. All the charities love us. Every 2 months they get brand new clothes with the store tags still on them. Anyway, back to her medical update.

We were starting to get very concerned with Louises sick feeling she would get after eating meals. Within 10 minutes after eating she would feel very full and bloated. She would be nauseated, feel hot, shakey, very fatigued and just generally rotten. It was happening now almost every day. So we went to the GI doctor that she, in an earlier blog, threw under the bus. He ordered the endoscopy and next week's pet scan because he was so concerned that it might be cancer back. As you already know, the endoscopy proved that her new esopha/stomach looked "as good as it could look" (in his words). He then told us her problem was caused by a situation called "dumping syndrome". He was sure of it and told us to go research it. On Friday we saw the oncologist but we met with the cancer dietician before that visit. When we told her that the doctor thought Louise's problem was dumping syndrome, she was sure also that it was. She described the symptoms to us and they were exactly what she was having. She knew exactly what foods were causing it. They were the same foods I had already guessed. Any food that was high in concentrated processed simple sugars was the culprit. Every time Louise would drink an Ensure, Boost, Carnation Instant Breakfast or milk shake (all of which are high in concentrated sugars) she would have the symptoms.

Here is what dumping syndrome is: It happens with over 80% of the people who have had recent surgery of the stomach where they have cut out part of the stomach and especially with people like Louise who have no more valves to prevent undigested food to escape too quickly to the small intestines. And that is what happens, certain foods with high simple sugar (not natural fructose from fruits)leave the stomach too fast and overwhelm the intestines. They are not easily absorbed from the intestines. The body then pulls fluids from the body's cells to dilute the undigested food so that it can be absorbed. The robbing of fluids from the cells then dehydrates the body and fouls up the blood sugar chemistry in the body. The body releases too much insulin into the blood stream also. All of these changes caused by this "dumping" of the stomach to the intestines causes all of the symptoms that she has had. 10 days ago, when we stopped making her drink the Ensures and the milk shakes to help her gain weight, her sick symptoms ended. The dietician said that complex carbohydrates and high fiber, high protien type items will help prevent this dumping syndrome to happen. She can also lay down for 30 minutes after a meal so that gravity doesn't also cause the dumping. Louise picked up quickly on that. She loves to lay down any chance she gets.

Her new diet will be to eat things such as pasta, breads, nuts apples, pears, carrots, spinach, meats, butter, mayo, salad dressings, salads, eggs, fish, yogurt, cheese and peanut butter. She will not eat Ensures, etc., soda, jams, syrup, cakes, pies, candy, doughnuts, cookies (cookie dough). How will she ever survive without eating her own famous cookies. I can't imagine not eating some of those sweet things. I might choose to live with the symptoms if it were me. But you know what, she has had no craving for any of those sweet things since her surgery. Her body naturally retards her appetite for things that will make her sick.

So that's it. That is what has made her sick and now we feel so confident that we have solved that problem with diet. My biggest question in all of this is why the surgeon or the GI doctor never warned us of this happening. You can read it and understand it so easily from the internet. If it happens 80% of the time to people like Louise who have had this type of surgery, you would think that would be on some of the documents going home with you from the hospital or it would be the first guess the GI doctor would make after hearing the symptoms. Why put her through an endoscopy when the situation and symptoms point exactly to "dumping syndrome." Ya know, my new profession is going to teach medicine and doctor's bedside manor to doctors. I don't need 12 years of school. I just need experience with patients and google and I am set.

Anyway, after reading this blog, you too are an expert on dumping syndrome. We are so pleased with Louise's much improved health!!

Thanks for reading, Spence

Good News from the Doc

2011-04-27T19:41:00.003-07:00

Well, it was good news from the endoscopy! In fact, the doctor said it couldn't have been better. Now, THAT'S the kind of news we love to hear! He said that the stomach looked exactly how it should look. So we are very happy and thankful. Next Wednesday I get to have a pet scan to see if there are any traces of cancer in there...but for now, we will just rejoice in this latest news. For all of us, in whatever we are dealing with, life is kind of a roller coaster, isn't it? We are at the top of the roller coaster right now, and we are happy about that. Hang on in whatever part of the roller coaster you happen to be on right now.

To make things even better, I heard from each of my kids today--so nice to know they care and are thinking of me. That made my day. Love to all of you, Louise

News from doctor

2011-04-25T21:18:00.002-07:00

In all the excitement of having my friend, Sharie, here, I forgot to tell about my last doctor's appointment. It was last Tuesday with the GI doctor...and it wasn't a great appointment. Most of us have had an experience with a doctor who doesn't have much of a bedside manner, and this visit was one of those classic ones. It seemed like anything that Spence or I said, he had some negative thing to say about it. We were concerned about my stomach problems. They seemed to be related to when I drink milk or milk-type products. We mentioned that to him, and he pretty much discounted our opinions. Later on, when Spence said that it made me feel yucky when I ate things related to milk, he said, "Well, then don't feed her milk products." The whole appointment was kind of like that, where he discounted everything that we said. He told us later then to avoid milk products, and to eat more pasta and breads--in other words, load up on the calories. I had lost more weight since our last appointment, and he was not happy with that. He used the words that I was doing "bad," which wasn't a great thing to say to me that day (I don't like going to the doctor about my cancer anyway, so saying that I wasn't doing well was very discouraging to me)...and then he prescribed me to do some blood work, and have another endoscopy (which I'm doing on Wednesday of this week), and to schedule a pet scan...to see if there is any more evidence of cancer. Needless to say, I came away from that appointment, discouraged. However, Spence and I both know that they need to do these tests to see how I'm doing...so it's all part of the process. Once I got away from that negative appointment, I got better--and now I'm ready to go through more testing.

Since I haven't drunk any Ensure or Boost, or had any milk shakes, I seem to be doing better. That may just be a coincidence, but whatever it is, it is nice not to feel sick after eating. My brother-in-law was amazed at all the food I took at Easter, and that I could eat it. :) So I am doing better.

We really had a nice Easter--we went to church, of course, and I even got to teach a Sunday School lesson--that was fun. Then we went to Spence's sister's house in Mesa, and had a good visit there. I laid down after dinner, and was totally entertained by the little grandchildren who were there. We had a great time talking! Well, hopefully everything will check out okay with these tests--I'll keep you posted, when I know something. Take care, and have a great day. Love you, Louise

I Believe in Christ

2011-04-23T18:15:00.002-07:00

Hello everyone. Happy Easter! Thank you all for reassuring me that my blog is still being read. :) I guess I hadn't heard from some of you, and was beginning to wonder if I was just writing, and no one was reading. Thanks for building me up again!! :)

It has been a busy week for me. My dearest friend from forever ago (we became friends in the 4th grade!) was here for a few days, and we just had the best time. She is one of those people who you can do practically nothing with...and you still have fun. I love her very much. (I'll put pictures in a future entry). Even driving to Dairy Queen to bring a car to my daughter was a fun adventure. That is how it is when I'm with my friend, Sharie!

One of the things we did was to go over to our Arizona Temple grounds to see the annual Easter pageant. They set up a large stage right there on the temple grounds, and portray the life of Christ. It takes just a little over an hour, and it is a beautiful production. There is music and dancing and narration...and it is such a touching and profound way to truly celebrate what Easter is really about--the resurrection of the Savior, Jesus Christ. So today I just wanted to share with all of you my feelings about my Savior. I love Him--I honor Him as the Son of our Heavenly Father, who came to earth to show us the way to live. His is the perfect example of how we can be like our Father in Heaven. He is there to save and redeem us, and through Him, we can return to our Heavenly Father. Through what He did in the Garden of Gethsemane, and on the cross, He has made it possible for us to live with Father in Heaven again. He took upon Himself all of our sins and suffered for them--and if we acknowledge our own personal sins and repent of them, through His atonement, we can be made clean...and live with Heavenly Father again. His was the supreme act of love and sacrifice, and He did it because of His love for us. I am extremely grateful for Him, and pray that I can be worthy of His great sacrifice...because my greatest hope is to live with Him and His Father again. I hope and pray that all of us will consider what He has done for us...and truly rejoice that He has made eternal life possible for all of us. So have a happy and meaningful Easter. Much love always, Louise

Monday's Update

2011-04-18T18:36:00.005-07:00

Hello everyone. I'm not sure if there are many of you reading this anymore, but I'll write anyway. I am including a picture of me on my birthday at Outback, where they brought us this yummy sundae (perfect size!), and all of us devoured it! It didn't take too long. :) I also am putting a picture in of me with my niece who just came to visit me, Meg Adair. I will put in one more crazy picture of her with Kelsey--my favorite pictures are the funny ones, where people put on their crazy faces! So enjoy them all. :)

I am doing pretty well. We are going to the GI doctor tomorrow. As I have written, I have had some stomach problems--I am trying to watch what I eat, to see if there is any pattern as to when I start feeling badly. It's more just a yucky feeling, rather than being totally nauseated. However, yesterday at Church I felt badly and sat outside in my car for all of sacrament meeting. After a while the feeling seems to pass, but it happens more often than we would like. We don't really know the cause of it--if it is remnants of my surgery, if it's because my plumbing has been changed,or if it's just feeling badly from time to time. We would like answers, but sometimes those are hard to get.

I have been working out at the cancer center. My arms are really stiff, and it is hard for me to reach for things. So the trainer there is working with me on trying to get those muscles to stretch, and to get them stronger. I wish this "process" was over, and everything could go back to normal...but so much for wishing! Anyway, that's about it from here. I hope you all are doing well. Love always, Louise

Happy Friday to you all!

2011-04-15T08:13:00.003-07:00

It has been a whole week since I've written. I thought that was super nice of myy sister, Laura, to make an entry on my birthday. Thanks for all your kind wishes and words--I had a wonderful day. I broke out of my normal routine, and went over to my sister-in-law's scrapbooking store, where she now has fabric...and took a quilting class. It was so much fun! I even went out to lunch too, and had fun there. But, as usual, I was pretty wiped out when I got home. :) Still don't have the energy that I would like to have.

I also went out to lunch with a friend on Wednesday, and that was good too. However, I have kind of "paid the price" this week for going a little more than usual...and guess I still need to pace myself better. I am still having some stomach problems--we're not sure if it is just my body getting adjusted to my new "plumbing" or if it's related to what I eat. But I need to be very careful not to eat too much...and I still struggle because I have very little desire to eat. It is still a learning process, and I am still in recovery mode, although i would like to deny that!

I am so thankful to be taking less pills. Like I said last week, I am off the cumadin, and so don't have to have blood work taken every week. (My arm was starting to look a little like a pin cushion!) I am also off the Flagell for the C-Dif, and am hoping with all my heart to be done with C-Dif forever!

I get calls almost daily from Katie, my daughter, who just got engaged...and we are happy that now we can officially work on her wedding plans. (We were working on them, but now we have the official "go ahead" to do whatever needs to get done). Once again I am working on a wedding long-distance. It would be nice if we could be closer to work on some of these things together...but thank heavens for phones and emails, and other ways of communication. :) Well, that's about it for today. I have been taking some walks with my dog this week, and we both enjoy that. Have a good Friday. Love to all, Louise

Celebrate Louise Day!

2011-04-11T11:15:00.000-07:00

Today is Celebrate Louise Day! It is her birthday and we are thrilled to be celebrating my sweet sister. She is my hero: I love her strength, sense of humor, kindness, sassyness, attentiveness, and loving spirit. We are especially thankful today for our Father's hand on her life, her tenacity against cancer, her surgeon, the Roxy and the Zappers Team, her home team (Kelsey, Brady and Spence), her friends who feed, transport and encourage her, her hobbies (thanks Marty for fanning that fire), and of course, her fave: Ensure, keeping her from wasting away. It takes a village to keep a woman whole. It takes a village to love and celebrate her. So let's do it! She's worth it!!!

Great Family News!!

2011-04-10T09:07:00.002-07:00

I apologize for the kind of lame blog entries I just posted...but I'm making up for it by announcing our BIG news of the week--Katie, our daughter, is OFFICIALLY engaged! We are so excited. I am posting a picture of them, which shows how truly happy she is (and he is too!) He proposed in a very creative and romantic way--when we heard about it, both Kelsey and I just SIGHED! He made a scavenger hunt, and they went to several places where they had some memories (and some former dates). They ended up on a mountain where they had hiked, and looked out over Logan and seen the temple. It was there that they first talked about getting married in the temple. He had a table set up with a tablecloth, flowers,an oil lantern, and some sparkling cider resting in a wine cooler thing that was filled with SNOW! He even brought his laptop and had a slide show of pictures of them. Then he got down on his knee, and proposed! WOW--we were super impressed at all that he did to make it so special for her. :) The one thing he couldn't do is to stop it from snowing! That is Utah for you--snow in April! So now Katie and Cody truly are official--and we'll have a wedding on August 5th! We are all thrilled.

Just a sidelight about me. I went to have an ultrasound this week to see how my blood clot was doing. It is now in an "insignificant vein" (Did you know that some veins are more significant than others?!), and therefore is not a threat to me. SO I am off the cumadin!! Hooray--I love taking less pills. I am also not taking the pill for the C-Dif anymore...and truly hope that I will never get that horrible stuff again. So, now my week is freed up...and I don't have to have my blood drawn every week. Life is getting better and better!

Anyway, here is a cute picture of Katie and Cody--we hope you will rejoice with them in their happiness--it is such a neat time for them. :)
Much love always, Louise

2011-04-07T21:46:00.001-07:00

Ok--don't ask me how that happened. I was just typing along, and all of a sudden, it said that it had published my post--still I'm technologically challenged! (Sometimes I feel like the computer has TURNED on me!)

I have been feeling pretty well. Today I was talking on the phone, and all of a sudden I didn't feel so well, so I got off...and just rested. I don't know if that's post-op feelings, or just the fact that my body is old and tired. But whatever--I still take a break, and then usually I feel better.

I have worked out twice at the cancer center, and hope to be able to do it again tomorrow. I am now up to a grand total of 20 minutes of exercising--every little bit is a little triumph. I love those "trainers" in there--they make everyone feel like they are a champion, just for being there. I really don't have much to tell today, so I'll say good-night. Have a happy Friday

2011-04-07T21:43:00.002-07:00

It's been a couple of days since I've written. Next time I'll post a picture, but I still haven't downloaded the latest from my camera. This week our visitors have been my niece, Meg Adair, and her fiance, Kevin McCall. It has been great to visit with them. Unfortunately, it has been 3 1/2 years since I've seen Adair. It is lots of fun to be with her, and she has much to say--so there is never a lag in the conversation. :)

Love that Kelsey Girl!!

2011-04-03T21:20:00.003-07:00

I just enjoyed a great weekend, listening to our General Conference. We listen to talks from many of our leaders, and it is very inspiring and uplifting. It always seems to come at the right time--when I am feeling depleted spiritually and need a spiritual "boost." I am so thankful for leaders who are in tune with Heavenly Father, and who encourage us to live in such a way that we can have His spirit to be with us.

I have not felt totally well the last few days. I have had an upset stomach at times, and I am experiencing more hot flashes--sigh, not fun! I'll talk to my doctor tomorrow, and hopefully get some ideas of what I should be doing. It has also been hotter temperature wise here, so that is part of my problem too! Today I took a 3-hour nap, so I still am not 100% on energy--still working on that. Last week I worked out 3 times at the cancer center, and did a little more each day. I also met with my oncologist for my once-a-month appointment, and I guess things are going along all right. This week I have an ultrasound to see if I still have the blood clot that I got in the hospital. But, on the whole, I am doing well.

I am posting a picture of me and my daughter, Kelsey. For those of you who have followed my blog, you have read several times about her. She has been an incredible help to me, and totally sacrificed to be with me and do errands for me, etc. She has really given me lots of service, and I love and appreciate her so much. I want to tell you about what she did for me this week that really touched me. I was bringing dinner into a friend, but had had a busy day already--gone to the doctor, worked out, gone grocery shopping. I was tired. I was talking on the phone to another one of my daughters, and said something about being tired. Kelsey wasn't in the same room, but she had overheard me. I went to rest for a minute before starting the dinner, and in she came, to tell me that she would make the casserole and the salad for these people. She wanted me to take a little rest so I could keep going for the rest of the day...and that's what she did--made the dinner basically for them. That is the kind of person Kelsey is--she is sensitive to people's needs and then goes out to serve them. She has done so many things for me and I am just so thankful for her. Truly she has been a great blessing in my life this year--I am going to miss her so much when she goes to college in the fall. To top it off tonight, she played the piano--I LOVE having her play the piano for me!! :) Anyway, that is a summary of my life for the past few days. Have a happy Monday--love to all, Louise

Happy Birthday, Em and Michael!

2011-03-30T15:42:00.003-07:00

Happy Birthday to two of my kids! I decided to dedicate this blog entry to Emily and Michael, who are celebrating birthdays today and tomorrow. I have been searching for a picture to put in of them--Emily is totally photogenic, and Michael usually is making some silly kind of face...so here's one that is pretty good of both of them from last summer. I just want to tell you a little about them, as a birthday tribute. Emily is a wonderful, no-nonsense kind of person. She does not get hung up on silly little things, and was never your typical dramatic girl. She is wonderful with kids, and will be an awesome mother. When there is a baby around, she is with that baby--and loving it. When she took care of me for a couple of days, she was very organized and got lots done. She is very sweet to people, and especially loves her grandparents. You can depend on her to get things done. She has always been focused on spiritual things, and cares about the important things in life. I am proud and grateful to be called her mother.

Michael is a fabulous addition to our family. He brings a lot of fun and happiness wherever he goes. He even jumps over garbage cans and walls...and that is the truth! He is interested in so many things, and I am always impressed that he can talk to just about anyone about anything. He is friends with everyone in our family...and just about anyone tha he knows. He loves to be active, and always gives our Brady a run for his money when it comes to playing basketball. He is a good worker, and very committed to living the Gospel. I am so thankful he is in our family, and I am very glad that I can call him my son. So, happy birthday, you two--we love you!!

I am learning to maybe scale back a little. I think I have gotten a little over-zealous in what I think I can do...and I have felt very tired and a little bit sick...so I need to be more careful. I DID go to the temple today with a good friend, and that was nice, but a little bit exhausting. As always, it's a learning process of what you can and can't do. Thanks for your love and support--it continues to be a real strength in my life. Much love always, Louise

A very full weekend

2011-03-28T07:01:00.002-07:00

I had a very big weekend this weekend, and I don't think I'm quite ready for all that yet. Saturday I went from one thing to another, and finally had to stop mid-afternoon, just so I could recuperate. I needed to do some birthday shopping, but my daughter, Kelsey, did that for me--I just had run out of energy. Spence tried to get me to cut some things out, but as usual, I was stubborn and thought I could do it all. Kelsey is going away to school in the fall, and I better have more energy by then--I depend on her for so many things. She has been a great support.

I started working out at the cancer center last week. The great things about the "trainers" there is they appreciate any effort you put out, and they applaud anything you do. My workouts are small (about 15 minutes), but I'm going to try to be more consistent and build up my energy that way too. I have gone out to eat a couple of times, and the people I'm with are always so happy that I can eat. I'm very happy about that too!!

Friday I got to be with another friend--check out the picture. This is my friend, Debbie Meany, who is our beach friend. I met her thousands of years ago when we were both at UC Davis in California, and we have been dear friends ever since. She is such a good friend that she decided to show her empathy by having surgery the exact same time AND day as I did. They thought she had a cancerous tumor, but it turned out to be benign--that was so wonderful. But we are both recovering from surgery, and understand some of the similar things we've been through. She came and spent the day with me--drove 3 hours up and back from Blythe, just to spend some time with me. That is the kind of friend that she is. We had a great time together. Well, that's a quick (sort of quick) summary of our weekend--hope you are all doing well.

Oh, just one more thing. I thought again of how the little things are the big things. I came to bed late one night. I need to have my head elevated so that I don't aspirate, and I hadn't put the pillows on my side of the bed. When I came to bed, the pillows were there and my side of the bed was turned down--a "little thing" that Spence had done, but it touched me a lot. I hope we can all take time today to do a little thing that will show a loved one or someone that we care. Have a great day--love to you all, Louise

Fabulous Friends

2011-03-24T23:19:00.003-07:00

Years ago when we lived on the west side of town in Glendale, we made some really wonderful friends--the great thing is that they still are our wonderful friends, and mean so much to us. Tonight we got together for dinner and for visiting, and it was just the best night ever. I am so thankful for each of them, and the way they have blessed our lives...and for their continuing friendship and support. Truly the saying is right that says, "Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver and the other's gold." These friends are just the best.

So I'm putting a picture in. I have tried to edit it so I wouldn't have totally red eyes--but if I changed my eyes, my face went gray...and then you would worry that I wasn't feeling well, so you'll just have to look at me with my lovely red eyes. We went to dinner, and then we went to the Eliason's house (one of the couples), and just talked and laughed. It was a great evening. All the other couples have served missions for our Church--we would love to do that, but need to finish raising our children (or the one who's going to be left at home--our 13-year-old, Brady). It was just great to share experiences and feelings--and I think we all left, feeling so grateful for friendships that last through the years.

It's funny how much better I am feeling. The fact that we could be gone for 4 hours, and I not be totally exhausted is pretty miraculous. I walked today and worked out (just for 15 minutes--but that's something!) at the cancer center. I AM getting better! Yesterday was a pretty big day, so today I took it easier and rested more so that I could be ready for tonight. Anyway, that's about it from here for today. Love to all, Louise

Sweet Times at the temple

2011-03-22T22:15:00.003-07:00

This has been an incredible day for me where I have really felt the Spirit of my Heavenly Father. It has been a sweet and a very welcome experience for me. Tonight Spence and I went to the temple. It is the first time I have been there since we went with our kids right after Christmas. Going to the temple is really important to me, and it has been hard to not go there for the last couple of months. I loved being there.

Then this morning I went to my institute class, and we had a wonderful experience in there too. We talked about the "tender mercies" of the Lord, where He blesses us in small but very significant ways. Some of the women in there shared some personal experiences where they had felt the hand of the Lord in their lives, and it was just so touching. Therer are moments like that when you feel such a strong bond--we felt that in that class today. So, I just feel really grateful to be feeling better, and to be able to feel some of those feelings again. It's another example of appreciating experiences that we often take for granted. Sometimes we need to go without things to know how blessed we truly are.

Monday's Moments...

2011-03-21T22:20:00.003-07:00

Life is just kind of going along. Tonight we had Spence's parents over for dinner--they were supposed to go too a spring training game, but it was rainy and cold...so we just watched the game in our family room. We were much more comfortable that way.

I am feeling pretty good. I am still keeping track of my calories with my online program. If I felt more like eating, I could increase that intake. All my doctors say I just need to force myself. Today we went to see the GI doctor, and so far I'm doing well. I have such a different look now--with my dark hair (no more color from a bottle...at least for a while), and very short. People often comment on the new "cut" I got--that wasn't exactly my choice, but it is what it is. :) I don't miss wearing my wig--it just never was super comfortable to me.

I am doing well at the 3-hour block at church now--can stay for the whole time, and not even feel exhausted when I'm done. Last night I had a crazy experience with a very violent hot flash--I felt sweaty and clammy and very weak and shaky. But, what was so weird with the whole thing--when it was done, I was super hungry. I am rarely hungry, so that was crazy. But the food tasted good--right now one of my favorite things to eat is Greek yogurt and fruit.

I also had an episode a couple of days ago, where I ate a carrot, and it got lodged in my throat. I couldn't get it out, but finally coughed it out. It was a scary feeling to not be able to swallow and to feel something lodged there--and to not be able to do anything about it. I was pretty emotional after all of that, and am thankful that I don't have many experiences like that.

The kids are back in school, and this looks like it could be a pretty busy week for us. One of the best things that is happening to me is that I can contribute some service at Church. I help coordinate compassionate service in our ward (like when someone is sick or just had a baby or there's any other kind of need). Right now we have some people who need help, and it feels so good to be able to be part of giving them that help--even coordinating other peoples' efforts feels so good to me. We all need to feel useful. I'm grateful I can do something for other people when so many people have done so much for us. Anyway, that's it for tonight--have a good Tuesday.
Love to you all, Louise

2011-03-18T09:13:00.003-07:00

Another week has come and gone...and this has been a really fun week. My sister, Laura, and her daughter, Lizzie, came to visit...and we just had the best time. It was our spring break too, so that meant my kids were around. Lizzie and my son, Brady are about 6 months apart in age, and had a fabulous time together--they both have a lot of energy, and played practically every game we have in the house. They are both competitive, but both laughed a lot. It was wonderful to see them having so much fun together.

My sister, Laura, is the easiest person to have around.(she can even get Brady to do much better at his chores than I can). We laughed a lot, talked a ton, and just had a great time. She is a napper too (runs in our family) so we also had many breaks. We had big plans for this week--and did practically none of the things we had planned. We were going to go out to see my sister-in-law's scrapbooking store, but I got sick that day (actually threw up), so we changed plans and had a quiet afternoon at home...and watched "Karate Kid." She helped with making dinners and cleaning up, and we did handwork together...and went outside to read, but ending up talking instead. She is such a good friend to me, and we are very close. I will add a picture of her. I hated to have them leave, but we have a lot of fun memories.

Yesterday we went back to my surgeon, Dr. Perry. We had such a nice visit with him. He seems to warm up more every time we see him. He is still very encouraged with my progress, and feels good about how everything went with the surgery. It is good to get good reports.

My #1 challenge right now is getting enough calories. My sister got me on this online program to monitor my calories--and it helps me to keep track of what I'm eating. I need to worry less right now about nutrition (sometimes the most nutritious things don't have the most calories), and just try to get some more calories in me. It's not like I'm going on an ice cream diet--I just need to eat things that have calories and protein in them. Getting sick in the middle of the week did not make it easy to put in calories--nothing sounded good to me right then. It's funny, but sweet things just don't appeal to me like they used to. I used to down a whole box of Girl Scout cookies--now I am content with one. It's very weird, to say the least. Well, that's about it for today. Have a good weekend!

Tuesday Update

2011-03-15T09:03:00.002-07:00

It is Tuesday morning. We are still having fabulous Arizona weather--it may get a little warm tomorrow. I am having so much fun with my sister and niece! It is great to have them here. My sister is in Spence's camp, and has me having snacks all the time, trying to beef up my calorie count! My niece makes sure I drink my Ensure (one of my least favorite things to do), and so they are not only providing fun, but also providing incentives to get me to do better.

Yesterday we went shopping for a while, and then ended up at Chick Fil-A, for a chicken sandwich, and I ate practically the whole thing. My personal cheerleaders cheer when I do something like that! :) We have played games and taken a walk--they still make sure I get my nice long nap in the afternoon. So it's been great!

Sunday was a good day for me--another improvement. Spence and I made dinner together, and I didn't need to rest in between different things. I had the stamina to keep working on it, and didn't feel that total exhaustion that I had before. So my energy is improving. I also could visit with people more at church and again not feel totally wiped out. I am so grateful for the way I am gaining strength--and just hope that it will continue. Well, thanks for all YOUR cheerleading--wow, what a great bunch of friends and family I have. :) Love you all, Louise

So thankful for my companion!

2011-03-11T09:40:00.004-07:00

It is Friday--in 2 more days, my sister and niece will be here. It is nice to have people visit, and to feel like I can do some things with them. :) Katie and Cody left yesterday, and we had a good time with them. Again I had an "aha" moment yesterday. I still get tired more easily. In the morning I had some dear friends from California come visit for a while. After that, I went with Cody and Katie to look at a place for a reception (still waiting until the word is official that they are engaged). After that another friend came by who is a decorator and is going to help us with some remodeling, and she was here for about 2 hours. I was EXHAUSTED. I had plans for the evening, but stayed home instead and just had a low-key night. I still have to pace myself, and not put too much in one day. That probably doesn't sound like much, but even if I stand for too long, I get really worn out.

The other reason I wanted to write today was to write about Spence. I am putting a picture of him and me in this blog. I just want to say again how much I appreciate all he has done for me. I was reminded again by my sister of how lucky I am to have him by my side. He literally was with me every single day at the hospital--he tried to get some work done while he was there, but mostly he just catered to my needs and was my companion. He always checks up on me, and is the best at monitoring my progress. (He also makes me eat more calories, even if I don't want to!) He has continued on with routines with our children (scripture reading, prayers, etc) even when I may still be sleeping. He has done double duty around our house--all his chores plus several of mine, and has not complained. He is thankful that I can do more now, and that he can be relieved of some of those responsibilities, but he still does a lot. I am so thankful that he is such a caring companion, and that he exercises so much faith in my behalf. Truly I am thankful he is on my team--he is the best. I know you all know that too--you have witnessed how much he has done for me. I am very blessed. Have a good weekend. Love you, Louise

Wednesday THoughts...

2011-03-09T14:45:00.004-07:00

Hello everyone! Here I am again--we are having beautiful spring weather in Arizona--this is why people live here, for this fabulous time of year. I have had a couple of firsts (no big deal to most people, but firsts for me in quite a while)--today I am wearing flip flops--normally, I am in slippers or slipper socks or closed shoes...so today I broke out the flip flops--no big deal, but kind of for me. Two nights ago we ate at Subway, and I ate almost ALL of a 6-inch sub. WOW--that was another big step for me! And I loved it--it was absolutely delicious. :) So, that's the latest update on my teeny tiny baby steps that I take.

I had some thoughts last night as I went to bed. I am reading a book called Making Sense of Suffering--it is very good, and easy reading. One of the experiences was about a woman who was suffering from pancreatitis. She talked about how she was just enveloped during that time with feelings of comfort and spiritual strength. Obviously, it was a very painful and difficult time for her. I thought of my experiences and the feelings I had in the hospital...and how they were different from hers. In the hospital, I felt like I was just at survival mode--that I was just trying to make it through each hurdle, and I didn't have many deep or spiritual thoughts at the time--I was just trying to get through. I know I expressed to Spence sometimes that I didn't know if I was going to make it. Some of my more spiritual moments have come SINCE that time--now the things I read or pray about seem to have a deeper impact on me. Right then I was just trying to endure--I felt the love of others, but I have felt it more deeply in ways since I am not at such a survival level. Does that make any sense? I just know that some of the kindnesses that were extended to me at that time have come to mean more to me recently. So, if I didn't express enough gratitude at that time, I am feeling it more deeply now. So, for all your thoughts, prayers, emails, blog comments, and just for being you, I hope you can feel my heartfelt thanks. Life is good, and it is better because we can share the ups and downs with each other. Much love and thanks always, Louise

A Busy Weekend

2011-03-06T18:09:00.004-07:00

Well, here is my report for Sunday. Today was the best Sunday so far--I made it through the whole 3-hour block, and wasn't even tired. It was great! Spence is our Sunday School teacher, and he does a great job.

We are having fun visiting with Katie and her friend, Cody--I might even include a picture of them together. Well, I did put a picture in of all 3 of us--they look good; I look pretty tired. OH WELL... They will be here for most of the week--hopefully, he can survive meeting all the people we are introducing him to.

I had a big Saturday--at least for me, yesterday. I took it easy in the morning, but then I took Katie and Cody over to play practice with Katie's old play director, and met people there...and watched the practice for a while. After we got home, some friends of ours from Tucson arrived unexpectedly--what fun to visit with them. They were relieved to find that I wasn't laying in bed and wasn't totally wiped out. People who haven't seen me or talked to me are not sure how I will be! After they left (and they brought me the most beautiful roses--absolutely gorgeous!), we went out to dinner. So, for me, that was a lot of things to do in a day--and I even folded some clothes. :)

Today has been another fairly big day (remember "big" is pretty relative, considering anything is "big" for me.). I went to Church, and then it was home to dinner.After dinner we watched family movies, and then played games. I never took a nap today--I think that is the first day in a long time that I haven't done that. So, on to another week...and hopefully continued improvement! Love to all, Louise

Happy Friday

2011-03-04T10:07:00.003-07:00

Hello everyone. I had my kids take pictures of me last night. I will probably put the one in that Brady took--Kelsey's camera is too high in pixels, and I think you see more than you might want to!! She took pictures after I wore my wig, so my hair was pretty wild. Maybe when I feel braver, I'll show them to you!

Today is a big day for our family. Our daughter, Katie, who is 20, is driving down from Utah with her boyfriend...and we'll meet him for the first time today. They are getting pretty serious, and it looks like we could have a wedding this summer. There is never a dull moment, or time to really take it easy! But we're excited to meet him.

Last night I had another music appreciation moment. I went with my son, Brady, to a program at his middle school, where the band played. They were really good--it was just so good to be there, to be able to hear them and to be with him. It was good to walk around and see all the different things that were going on. I saw a few people who I know--so that was fun too. I hadn't walked yesterday, but I had to park my car so far away...I counted that for my walk. :)

I am going to the oncologist today. I will be seeing him every month for the first six months. I am doing pretty well. I just find that doing one major thing a day is about my maximum--but I can do smaller things, with small breaks in between. I still go in weekly to test the level of my blood--too thin or too thick, and they keep it well regulated. My eating is going pretty well--I do have my moments when something seems to get stuck in my throat. It's hard to know when you should worry about something or if it's just all part of the whole process.

I have talked to some different friends on the phone this week...and that has been so fun. I do feel like I'm getting more in the normal swing of things, bit by bit. So I'll let you know how things go this weekend. Love you lots, Louise

And life goes on...

2011-03-01T17:52:00.003-07:00

I intended to put a picture in here of myself...with my new "do." Maybe next time... Sometimes I wear my wig, but most of the time, I just go "au naturel" with my very short hairdo. My hair has come in dark with gray--bummer, I was hoping to have hair like my mom with very little gray. (I'm still trying to pretend I'm younger than I am!) It was very traumatic to lose my hair (as you might recall), but now that it left and is coming back, it doesn't bother me at all. I guess you realize in the big scheme of things, the length of your hair is pretty insignificant.

I made it through the 3 hours of church. By the end of the second hour, I was pretty tired, but I'm glad I stayed for the last hour--we had a great lesson on simplifying our lives. That is something that an illness forces you to do, whether you want to or not...and you realize that there are MANY things you can cut outof your life. We tend to make our lives more complicated than they need to be.

I also went to institute class (a church class in the middle of the week)for the first time in months--actually ever since I was diagnosed. It was wonderful to be there--to be learning and discussing spiritual things. Then I went and got a fruit smoothie with a good friend. I have slept quite a bit this afternoon--so I still need to pace myself--one big thing (or just one thing) a day is enough for me right now.

Last night I actually made a good part of our dinner. Again in that process I had to pace myself--I would make part, and then take a rest, then get up again and do something more. Again I was exhausted, but I did it...and it tasted good! I am thankful my family is patient with me, and doesn't expect too much...and they are proud of me for doing anything. Have a good day, and thanks again for "listening" to me report on my days!! Love you, Louise

Sunday Morning

2011-02-27T10:00:00.002-07:00

Hello everyone. It is Sunday morning, and since we don't go to Church until 1:00, I have plenty of time in the morning to do things...so rather than wait till tonight, I decided to write now. I am hoping to go to our whole block of meetings today--which is 3 hours. Each Sunday I have added another hour, and hope to be able to do that today. It DOES make me tired...but I am building endurance! Yesterday I went to our Church women's conference, and was there for nearly 3 hours. I loved being there, but was pretty wiped out in the afternoon. When we asked the surgeon about how much I slept, he said that would continue for 3-6 months...so it made me feel like I wasn't totally abnormal. I am sleeping well at night--and that is such a blessing to be able to do that. I am so glad to be back sleeping in my bed. :)

Let me tell you what I discovered last week about my eating. I think I've finally worked out a workable routine for myself. I really can't eat the normal 3 meals. I get too full and too bloated, and really don't feel very well when I do that. I can't lie down (which is what I feel like doing), because then everything comes right back up. So now I am eating very small portions more often, and that seems to be working for me. They wanted me to eat regular meals, and then portions in between, but I was not hungry at all for any kinds of snacks. This is working better for me. I feel better. I know I'm not getting enough calories in, but at least I am enjoying the food more, and eating more often. What a unique position to be in--to be forcing yourself to eat--isn't that crazy? Well, that's about it from here--I'll just hope that I can make it through all my meetings today. Good days to all of you, Louise

Some random thoughts on precious things...

2011-02-25T09:42:00.003-07:00

Last night I went out to dinner in Mesa with Spence's family. We really had a good time, and I got parts of other people's dinners, along with having some clam chowder. My father-in-law loved seeing me eat--he's had me at some meals where I haven't eaten anything. He has been such a great cheerleader to me during all this, and he always had great faith that things would all work out. Isn't it great to be around people that are so positive? (and who have so much faith).

I just found out that a very dear friend of mine has cancer. I am in denial, much as I was when I first found out about me. I hope that I can do anything to help her, because she has been there so much for me. Maybe having experiences like this helps to remind us of how much we need to support and help each other--and that makes it all worth it...just to be more aware of other people's suffering, and to do whatever we can to help and love them. People are so precious--time is just too short, not to tell them how much they mean to us...and to do all that we can to make their own personal roads that much smoother. I am so grateful that we don't have to make it through this life alone, and that the loved ones around us can share our joys and sorrows. I am also so grateful for prayer and for the love and concern that we feel from our Heavenly Father and from our Savior. May we each take time this day to reach out in love and compassion to all those around us. Sometimes just a little thing that we can do will mean so much. With all my love today and always, Louise

Back to bed...and it's a good thing!

2011-02-22T09:19:00.002-07:00

I am not sick in bed, but for the last two nights, I have actually slept in my bed. Ever since I got home from the hospital, I have been sleeping in our recliner in our room. It just gave me more flexibility during the night. I tried one night of sleeping on the wedge in the bed and it was just too stiff and uncomfortable to me. So then the recliner just worked better. I could pile on blankets and have enough pillows to keep me elevated. A couple of days ago I felt like I could try my bed again. Since I have my stitches out of my side, and feel more comfortable sleeping on my side (at least at times), it has worked out well. Getting in and out of the recliner at night wasn't always the easiest thing, but it worked out ok. Spence now gets his recliner back so he can watch the news!

Spence worked very hard outside on President's Day. I folded laundry and read, and worked on some Scout things with my son, Brady. On Sunday I was able to go to 2 hours of church (I'm increasing it each week by one hour). I was much less exhausted this time of going than I was last week...so I hope that means I am gaining more energy. Someone told me that I didn't look as pale this week--so I hope that's a good sign also.

We got the news last week that our son, Brian, and his wife, Keri, are expecting their second baby. We are so excited. With that one and Emily's due in May, we will have 3 grandchildren--I can't believe it!

I'm just going to say again how thankful I am to be done with the feeding tube. It was really uncomfortable and pulled on my stomach (or intestines--we're not sure what part of the body we're talking about now!) and caused me some pain. I am also thankful to eat regular food--I love the tangelos from our tree. I enjoy being able to keep things down! :) Spence is especially thankful that I can eat again. I am even doing better swallowing pills!! So that's my report for right now. I was going to go to a church class this morning, but things didn't quite work out. Thanks again to you all--I pray that I can support you like you have supported me. Much love always, Louise

A Family Funeral

2011-02-18T19:01:00.003-07:00

Today I went to the funeral of our cousin, Ed Boyd. He had many health issues over many years, and suffered much. However, his family is full of faith and hope and were so complimentary of the way he handled all that suffering. They said he never complained--I turned to Spence, and said, "You'll never be able to say about me, will you?" I am just blown away by people who go through so much and are so patient through their suffering.

One of the things that was amazing about Ed and his family--in spite of all that they were going through, we often got calls from them about how I was doing. It is not easy to look beyond your own situation when it is so critical and heart-wrenching, but that's exactly what they did for me. Each one of their family members that I talked with today was so genuinely concerned for me and so interested in how I was doing. What a lesson for us all to learn--to go beyond ourselves when we are hurting so much. That is not an easy thing to do. I was very touched by their sincere concern for me.

At the funeral they mentioned their oncologist several times...and the wonderful doctor that he is. At the end of the funeral, they called him up to speak, and I was so impressed. In fact, I was ready to switch oncologists. He was so warm and caring it was unbelievable. That is a trait that not every doctor has. He talked about Ed having esophageal cancer, and how he went through the chemo and radiation. It was a little hard for me to hear all that, because it hit so close to home. Still, I was very touched by what he said, and talked to the doctor afterwards. So, all in all, it was a very good experience for me--a true celebration of Ed's life and many wonderful tributes about the influence of one good man. So...onto the weekend, and hopefully another time at church. Take care, Louise

Hooray--I am FREE!

2011-02-17T19:28:00.002-07:00

HOORAY--I no longer have a feeding tube--is that the best news ever? I am so excited, and was just so grateful and happy after seeing my surgeon, Dr. Perry. Last weekend I had discovered some stitches that had never been taken out, so he took those out too. The whole thing was a little unnerving and temporarily painful...but it didn't last long, and now I am no longer attached to my tree, and my yucky formula!! Spence was there, so I could squeeze his hand when it got a little painful--how blessed I am to have him by my side. He has made such a difference. The doctor was actually more personable than usual, so it was a good visit...plus we didn't have to travel down to his office by Good Samaritan Hospital--he actually has one right here in Scottsdale. It was all good. So now I am eating on my own...and need to keep my calorie count up. I'm up for the challenge! :)

The last couple of days I have had some more energy. I haven't taken a morning nap either morning, and I have done a little more around the house. Today Brady and I took a longer walk around the neighborhood, so that was good too. The roofers are still here, still pounding, and that could be one of the reasons that nap-taking isn't quite as easy! It has just been a happy day. This feeding tube was much more painful to me--it really pulled on my skin and got kind of grotesque and bloody. Next week I could actually go swimming...if it was warm enough. Thanks for all your kind thoughts and encouraging words. I have the most wonderful friends in the world. Take care, and have a good Friday. Love you, Louise

The rebel patient

2011-02-16T09:05:00.003-07:00

I have a confession to make--I am a rebel patient. In other words, I'm not a very patient patient. Just ask Spence--he'll tell you. I am terrible about taking medicine. I hate anything that I have to drink, and make quite a big deal (I guess I must really grimace when I take it) of having to drink anything. For so long, I haven't been able to take pills, and now that I can, I still have problems swallowing some of them. I think part of it is in my head from all that time of not being able to keep anything down--I still worry that I will be able to.

Earlier this week, I couldn't stop from sleeping. It was like I had a sleeping sickness. I've felt that way with the C-Dif before, but I've been taking medicine for a while, so that shouldn't be the problem. We even have guys here working on our roof, and I can sleep through all that pounding--I am pathetic!! In the last couple of days, I've tried to stay up more--I'm even doing a few things around the house--some wash, some dishes, etc. It makes Spence feel like he's not doing everything himself. (he does get help from the kids, but still ends up doing a lot of stuff himself.)

They are still trying to balance my cumadin levels--I guess it's a pretty tricky thing. However, now when we go to have blood tests, we go to a much smaller clinic that no one knows about--that 3-hour wait was just TOO long! At this one, they get us in in about 20 minutes--it's great.

Tomorrow we go to see the surgeon again...and hopefully get my feeding tube out. For some reason, this one (different feeding tube) has given me more problems...and hurt more. I am ready to have it gone--I just hope I can eat enough to keep me going. I still think it's funny that I have to worry about getting more calories--since when has THAT been a problem. Well, have a great day--thanks for reading. Love you all a lot, Louise

Back to Church...finally

2011-02-13T18:54:00.002-07:00

Well, I finally made it back to church today. It was so nice to be there, and be among so many people that I love. Several of them read my blog, and were very much up to date with what was happening with me. There are so many people there that mean so much to me. Several commented on the miracles that had come to me. There is no denying that, but I attribute those miracles and my healing, in great part, to faithful people like them who have exercised so much faith in my behalf. They are definitely a strength to me. I loved being there to partake of the sacrament. Spence and Brady have been making sure they have brought it to me when I was home. However, it was nice to be able to sing the sacrament song before taking it...and feeling the spirit that comes from the music. After being hugged several times, I was exhausted, and ready to come home for a nap. I was going to go back for a child's baptism later this afternoon...but I just wasn't feeling great.

That has been the story of my life for the last few days. i feel a little sick to my stomach, and then I'm just tired. I know that I need to keep plugging along--just still hoping for an increase in energy. Until the next post, know that I love you, Louise

Coming along one baby step at a time...

2011-02-11T19:27:00.002-07:00

Spence says he's going to have to take charge of the blog, since I am just not consistent enough in writing. My life doesn't change that much from day to day...so I just give you updates. I am doing pretty well. Today Brady and I walked around our cul-de-sac twice--that's pretty good for me. Today was a better day for me because I wasn't gone as much as yesterday. I only went out once with Kelsey who took me to get some frozen yogurt--it was delicious!

Yesterday I had to have blood work done to see how my cumadin levels are (regulating how thin my blood is). Then Kelsey took me down to meet Spence and we had lunch at Subway. I had some soup. Then we went to the GI doctor. He was really nice, and spent time helping both of us. We talked about my C-Dif, and the flagyl I'm taking for that. He is going to keep me on it for quite a while--I just hope that the C-Dif will finally leave my system. He was pleased with how I look. He is still in amazement that I got cancer--see, you just never know.

On the way home from the doctor's, Kelsey and I stopped to get some Valentines...so by the time we got home, we were BOTH wiped out. I still have to pace myself, and try to not put too much into one day. One baby step at a time...

My eating is going great. However, I still can't eat much at one time. I get feeling bloated if I eat too much, or if I'm on the feeding tube for too long. I love being able to eat salads and fruit again. I just have to be careful. When they did the surgery, they took out the valves to my stomach and my esophagus. That makes it interesting if I happen to lean over after I eat--sometimes I can feel all that food coming back up! It doesn't, but it's still a weird sensation. I am able to be alone during the day--I read, crochet, and try to work on my computer, and of course (as you well know) take my naps. Have a great weekend!! Love you lots, Louise

Coming Out at the Outback

2011-02-08T21:47:00.002-07:00

I am back to the land of the living...at least for right now. Spence is right--that C-Dif is nasty stuff, and I hope to be rid of it once and for all. He has given you the details, but I really do feel miserable when I have it. If you ever hear of someone having it, be sure and give them lots of sympathy...and hope that they will be given the proper medicine. We go to the GI doctor on Thursday--I wish he could give me a lifetime guarantee that I will never get this again.

Last night was the first time I ventured out into society. Since I was too sick to go out for Kelsey's birthday on Saturday, we went last night to Outback. It was great! I had one of their dinner salads, and ate some other things from others' meals too...and was overly full and bloated afterwards...but it was such a great thing to be out of the house, and to be able to eat. We had a great time together. I still have to watch myself so I don't get too full--but I think that will be the story of my life from now on. It was just so nice to go out with my family.

Tonight I went out again--this time to Church for Brady's Scout Court of Honor. It had been since Jan. 2nd that I had been there at church. It was so nice to be there. The Court of Honor was very short and sweet...and then it was just so good to see people and visit with them.

I am also doing a few more things around the house--doing some laundry, working a little bit in the kitchen, and just being a little more proactive. I am determined to get better--I'm tired of being weak and tired. (I still take my naps though. :))Sorry that you have to keep praying for me. I AM going to get better!! Love you, Louise

C-Diff Strikes Again!

2011-02-05T21:34:00.002-07:00

Oh no, Spence is writing...its got to be bad news. Unfortunately I'm the designated writer when Louise is not up to it. And she is down again. What more does she have to go through? Anyway, for those of you who have been following this blog for a while, you will remember that Louise was the sickest when she got C-Diff three other times. Now she has it for a 4Th time. It is a very bad bowel infection that causes horrible diarrhea to strike on the average of about once an hour every hour of the day. All the cramping and nausea that goes with it makes life pretty miserable. You feel like you have extreme flu. You ache. You go hot and cold. Well let me just say that you are as miserable as you can be. How does a person get this plague? Most of the time it is because you have taken an antibiotic that kills the "good" bacteria in your colon and lets bad bacteria get through. People also get it after being in the hospital. However, Louise has been out 2 weeks and she has not had any antibiotic in a long time. I think, in her case, having had it 3 different times in the last 4 months, she just has this bug that never gets completely killed by the antibiotic. When she went into the hospital, she was still supposed to take this antibiotic flagyl, for another week. The surgeon, however cut it off. I can't believe it came back after a whole month of being off the antibiotic.

But come back it did in great force. Friday, at 2am it hit her hard. She has had the diarrhea and other symptoms non-stop since then. I called the surgeon and he said to take Pepto Bismol but if that didn't work we should take her into the ER at Good Sam today (to spend a whole day there for them to tell us it was C-Diff again). Last night she was so bad that I took another route. I called another doctor to kind of get permission to take the Flagyl again because we were pretty sure it was C-Diff. I have a whole bottle of it remaining. I got permission and he agreed I should grind it up and put it in her feeding tube because it can be very hard on the stomach. So I have been giving it to her for 24 hours and we are seeing the same results as before. Tonight she finally feels somewhat better even though the race to the bathroom continues, but not as often. She will have the diarrhea for 2-3 more days but will not feel as sick. And then it will go away after that. We will work with the GI doctor to put her on the only other antibiotic that will kill this disease once and for all.

Today is Kelsey's 18Th birthday and plans had to be changed for celebrating. We were going to go out to a restaurant and have Louise make her first appearance outside of our house and the hospital. But, plan B had to be implemented. Plan B stands for Back to Spence trying to cook a stake dinner for Kelsey and make it similar to a restaurant. I tried anyway.

Louise was also going to try to go to Sacrament Meeting tomorrow, but those plans have changed also. She has taken a few steps backwards. We are trying to hydrate her and get some food down her. She has eaten nothing (not even tube feeding) for 24 hours. Tonight she ate some of my scrumptious dinner so let's hope she can gain back some of those lost pounds soon.

Yesterday, between paudy trips, we went to the dietitian to get advice on how Louise can get more calories into her body by the time they take out the feeding tube in two weeks. We then went to the oncologist for the first time in two months. He examined Louise and felt like everything from a cancer standpoint looked in order. He was thrilled with the results of the surgery and the clean pathology reports on the extracted esophagus and the 6 lymph nodes taken out. He did warn us that the cancer could come back. For this reason he wants to examine Louise once a month for the next 6 months. He feels like if something does come back and it is caught early that there is much that can be done to fight it.

So there you have it. I'm sorry that you have to put up with my report one more time but Louise should soon be back at the keyboard, hopefully feeling much better.

Spence

Another recuperating day...

2011-02-02T20:58:00.002-07:00

Things are pretty much the same around here. This week I've been by myself in the mornings, and done just fine. I do about the same routine--Spence fixes me some breakfast in the morning (usually toast and some pear sauce--today, even a little banana), and then I get on my feeding tube. When I'm tired of that, I take a nap...and then pretty soon Kelsey is home from school. The one thing that we worry a little about is me choking--with my new digestion "aparatus" (basically my new stomach and intestines), I need to be careful that I can swallow...and that I don't throw anything up. I have actually done very well that way...and am able to keep everything down. What a blessing that is! Tonight it was meat loaf, corn and a roll--and I ate quite a bit of all that. I think that Spence enjoys watching me eat more than anything! He hated it when I couldn't keep anything down, and just had to sit at the table. He is a great fan and supporter, and I appreciate him a lot.

I am still sleeping on the recliner, but last night I did take a nap in our bed. I have to be propped up quite a bit--again so that I won't aspirate. I got so full on my feeding tube (sometimes I get this bloated feeling), and I didn't feel like eating any real food for dinner. It's times like that when I wish progress could just be continuous, and that there were no setbacks...but I guess that's life. (plus that really wasn't too much of a setback)

Today was cold again (remember this is cold for Phoenix), so Brady took me out on the treadmill and I did a whole 7 minutes. I'm adding a little each time. :) A friend came by today. It always amazes me that I can get winded just by walking someone to our front door or standing for too long. I know that will get better too. :) Have a great Thursday. Love you, Louise

2011-01-31T21:39:00.004-07:00

It is me again--a couple of days later, and hopefully somewhat stronger. My sister-in-law, Nancy, left...and I have to say I miss the extra pampering she gave to me. Spence just took me out on the treadmill, and I walked (very slow speed) for a big 5 minutes! Yesterday I walked to the end of my street...and got to see some of my neighbors. Today was somewhat rainy and cold,and I really don't want to get sick...so I stayed inside.

Can you believe this? I ate some lasagne, some bread, and some salad tonight. WOW--is that ever progress!! I stilll eat fairly small amounts, and am reminded to eat them very slowly...but it is wonderful to eat REAL food. (the orange jello and chocolate pudding in the hospital don't really count as food!) Both Brady and Kelsey gave us a concert tonight (that was our family night)--Kelsey on the piano and Brady on the guitar. It was very relaxing and nice.

My friend, Eileen Allred, came over to stay with me this morning. We are still a little nervous about me staying alone, but actually I can do it just fine. Eileen has been a tremendous support to me during this whole time, and has helped me often.

I am going to include some pictures for you. I know several of you have seen my new look through Facebook...but for those of you who don't have Facebook, you can see the new me. I am also going to include a picture of the scar on my neck--it is amazing how little you can really see it, and it is healing well. So here are some pictures for you to see.So that's the latest from here--hope you are all doing well. Love you lots, Louise

Great News from the doctor

2011-01-28T17:57:00.002-07:00

Yesterday I went to the doctor and went to have another blood sample taken. The doctor's appointment was very positive. We had to wait for a while, and I found myself getting pretty uncomfortable sitting there, but then they called my name. We got to see the whole team that we saw every day in the hospital, so it was nice to see them all again. I am sure they missed seeing me in my lovely blue hospital nightgown! The doctor basically told us that things really looked good. He told me that I looked good--that I had good color...and that I was doing well. He was very positive about the way the surgery went--that there were no cancerous lymph nodes that they found, that there was less scar tissue than they had expected, and there were no more cancer cells. THere could be no better report of what the chemo and radiation had done. He looked at my incisions, and was very pleased with how those were healing. He also told me that I could probably get my feeding tube out in 3 weeks--that is a yay hurrah! We all felt like there could have been no better report to get. We don't know what the future might bring (because we all know that cancer can reoccur), but for now the report couldn't be any better. Isn't that wonderful? I am so blessed--now I just need to keep working on this healing process.

Kelsey and I had a much better experience drawing blood this time. We had an appointment, and had to wait maybe 5 minutes to get in. It was great.

I've had some more visitors, and gotten some beautiful flowers--so I continue to be spoiled. Nancy has been so good to me--and waited on me, hand and foot. Your prayers and thoughts continue to give me strength and help. I love you all, Louise

Just hanging around...

2011-01-26T15:28:00.002-07:00

Hello to everyone. Today is a pretty normal day--if you call it normal, laying around, eating from the feeding tube, and talking as much as you want. :) Spence's sister, Nancy, and I have a lot of fun, hearing about the details of each other's lives. Today I had to put myself in my room, just so I would get a nap! Marti, another of Spence's sisters, came to visit. It is good to have visitors, and they don't even mind that I entertain them in my pajamas!

I have been trying to sleep on a wedge, but it is pretty uncomfortable, so last night I just slept on my recliner...and did much better. My back gets pretty sore on the wedge, and the recliner just makes it a little more flexible to sleep. I LOVE taking showers.

I still have some pain in my chest and in my back--however, I have mostly been able to get relief from Tylenol, which is far better than the harder stuff they were giving me in the hospital. Nancy is good at giving me little meals several times a day--so I am improving on my eating. She's a great cook, so that helps too!

We walked a little in front of my house yesterday--don't do it still as much as I probably should, but we're working on it. Anyway, that's just a little update--I take life pretty slowly, but I think that's ok. Have a good evening. Love you, Louise

Adjusting to home life

2011-01-25T07:46:00.002-07:00

I have now been home for 6 days. I didn't ever feel like I was going to come out of the hospital. It seemed like I was doomed to be there forever. Fortunately, that was NOT the case! Sorry I haven't written for a couple of days. Yesterday was a little different than we thought it would be. I had to go to a lab to make sure that the levels are right for my blood. Having the blood clot means I need to be sure that my blood is thin enough, but not too thin. So they needed to do some blood work. We waited 3 hours to finally get in...for a 30-second blood test. It was crazy. Nancy, Spence's sister, kept trying to get some idea of when I would get in. When we first got there, it was going to take 1- 1 1/2 hours, and we felt like we could wait that long...but the time kept stretching out. It was super frustrating. However, we did get to know many of the people there who was also waiting. They cheered when my name was finally called! By the time I got home, it was nearly 1:00, and I was exhausted...so I spent a good part of the rest of the day resting. I get tired so easily!

I am eating some now. Believe me, the food here is a lot more appetizing than the hospital food. In the hospital, it was different colors of jello or pudding--everything was sweet, and they never could be convinced that I didn't drink coffee or tea...no matter how many times we told them. :) The last few mornings I have actually had raisin toast--that has been wonderful. In fact, last night Nancy made us meatballs, and I ate a whole one. However, we did find out that I can't eat quite that much yet...I was full and didn't feel so well when I went to bed. It's all a learning process.

Nights have been a challenge. The first couple went pretty well, but now I need to change positions--get off the wedge I'm sleeping on, and sleep for a while on our recliner. The change of position really seems to help. I am still having some pain in my chest, but usually Tylenol can help relieve that. (I would much rather do that than go to "La La Land" with a bunch of heavier pain medications)

Spence is back to work, but still worries about me from there. It is good for him to get some of his work done--we're working towards normal. We're not there yet, but hopefully we'll improve each day. Thanks for your love and support, Louise

Happiness is being home...

2011-01-22T15:32:00.002-07:00

Hello everyone. I am home from the hospital...and that is a great feeling. I wish I could do a little more--I know I will improve, but right now it is all I can do to walk from my room to our family room. However, my family keeps cheering me on, like I'm running a marathon...mabye in my own little way, I am!

Wow--what can i say? You have all been so loyal and caring through our hospital experience. I can't thank you enough for waiting until late at night to read the latest posts from Spence. You not only read them, but commented so often on them--that means so much. Spence would keep me daily informed on what each person said, and that was so touching to me. Didn't Spence do great on the blog? He is so good at explaining things, and he always adds a little bit of his crazy humor. He is a good writer--now you'll have to put up with me again. :) It is time for Spence to go back to work, and not be full-time nurse and caregiver. Our daughter, Emily, is here from Utah, just till tomorrow. It is wonderful to have her here, and to be back home with Kelsey and Brady. I am so thankful to have my family around me--wish they all could be here, but I'm just glad for who can be here. Tomorrow Spence's sister, Nancy is coming to help for the week. I am so spoiled.

Thank you for your prayers also as we've gone through this. Spence was pretty positive in all his posts, but I definitely had my down and discouraged times. Knowing that so many people were praying that I could feel peace and comfort was a huge help. You are like a huge family to me--giving love, encouragement and support every step of the way. I will be writing more--but just wanted to say that I do not miss having my vitals taken eveery 4 hours, or being poked and prodded. I may move slow...but thank heavens i am HOME!! Love to all, Louise

Day 18 ....There Is No Place Like Home!

2011-01-20T14:50:00.002-07:00

Louise entered her home about 1:30 today. Everyone was so excited to have her home. Even our dog Sport was all over her. There were no complications today that would keep her in the hospital. Her white blood count was down to the normal levels. The doctor thought that she had probably walked too much the day before and then had had so little sleep because of the Mexican party going on in the bed next to hers to all hours of the night. Otherwise she probably could have easily gone home the day before. But she is doing so well. She had to lay down and catch her breath in the hospital before she left because putting clothes on herself for the first time in 18 days was a much bigger job than she thought. The doctor was very pleased with her progress and his prognosis was very good!

Emily flew in from Utah last night to take care of her for the next 4 days. She and I brought her home today and I finally could go back to work and try to start my recovery from under a lot of back-up work. My company has been so patient and supportive through this.

So thus ends a big chapter in Louise's road to recovery!!

Spence

Day 17: An easy quiet day still in the hospital

2011-01-19T20:26:00.002-07:00

I posted an early blog today at 3 pm to let everyone know that we need to wait another day to hopefully get released. Apparently the blog that I posted didn't allow comments. So I will give a short update in this second blog.

Even though her white blood cell count was very elevated this morning, I don't think that there is anything really wrong other then the fact that she has been ripped apart a few times and this poor body is trying to repair many hot spots. Of course, I am no doctor and don't know a thing but I thought I would make an educated guess. She showed no signs of anything serious going on. She never had a fever. Her vital signs were great all day and she didn't really feel achy or otherwise sick. We lounged in her new private room with the door closed all day so it was very peaceful. I would be surprised if they don't let her go home tomorrow. They will do the blood test early, so we should know early if she can go. Louise was very patient with the extra day. We will let you know tomorrow what the new verdict is.

Thanks for your attention.

Spence

Quick update. Oops didn't go home today

2011-01-19T14:43:00.001-07:00

Wouldn't you know it. When we are all geared up to go home, they change our plans again. Last night, in the middle of the night, Louise had chills and hot flashes for a while. Early this morning they did a routine blood test and found that her white blood count had gone up significantly. They didn't want to send her home with an infection, especially one that was in the lungs. They decided they wanted to monitor her for at least another day to see if it was anything. They are not putting her on antibiotics for now. They said it could just be the body further healing. She has not had a temperature through the night or through 3 pm today.

She did get a private room out of it. Her roommate was a hispanic lady who didn't speak English. They had a party by the next bed and kept her awake until 11:30. Once Louise complained they kicked the party out and promised Louise a new private room today (which we are enjoying now).

Obviously we were disappointed that this happened but she sure didn't want to take an infection home and maybe have to return. So we are okay with this little setback. But as for me, if this goes on much longer I'm going to be on the rolls of the unemployed. I still have not gone back to work in the month of January.

From the homeless and unemployed!

Day 16: Homeward Bound

2011-01-18T22:26:00.002-07:00

Tomorrow she comes home! Last night I truthfully thought she was not ready to come home yet. Monday she had spent most of the day in pain or out cold because of the narcotics they gave her to fight the pain. Louise is so sensitive to drugs that I usually tell anesthesiologists to make aspirin the general anesthetic when they need to knock her out. Yesterday she had no energy. Even getting out of bed was a real strain. So as I left her last night I went to the nurse and almost demanded that she not be given the narcotic they had been giving her if she had pain. Give her Tylenol. When I arrived this morning she was a changed person. She felt so much better. She had little pain and had not been given any pain medicine overnight. She could roll out of bed on her own and use the bathroom without help. She was ready to walk. Five times we took walks around every pod on the 7th floor. She had energy and she was a happier person. She even doubled the height on her spirometer. That gave her so much confidence.

So then at about 1 pm, Dr. Perry comes in and tells her she is cleared to go home tomorrow (Wednesday). He was very pleased with her progress. Louise was very excited. Last night she really didn't feel like she was ever going to be well enough to get out. We both feel she is now. Not that it will be easy being home without a call button and a shot of pain killer with just push of a button. But the comforts of your own soft bed and your own pajamas that don't have tubes coming out of every opening is so exciting. I'm home now trying to arrange for alarms to go off every 10 minutes and I'm training the kids how to wake her up every half hour to take her temperature and draw blood. We don't want her to get too comfortable all at once and feel too strange in a dark room all night with no noise.

We met with the dietitian today and set up the feeding regime. She will remain on the same feeding pump that she was on before the surgery. She can pretty much get most of her daily nourishment needs from the pump overnight. Then as she is allowed to eat more as time goes on, we will cut the amount of feeding nourishment she gets. Right now she will stay on soft foods until the doctor is sure that solid foods won't hurt the connecting tissues in her neck. We don't know how long that will be. She also might have to take home an oxygen tank for a little while.

So this was the best day she has had in the hospital, not only for getting the ticket to go home, but also to finally feel better and be more mobile. We will let you know how home feels to her tomorrow. Thanks for caring!

Spence

Day 15: ICU C Ya

2011-01-17T19:58:00.002-07:00

Greetings to all of the followers of Louise's journey to recovery. Today is the 3rd Monday in this hospital. Her operation was two weeks ago. In our 36 years of marriage, this is the longest consecutive time she has stayed anywhere besides our two homes. Its a good reason to call it a home away from home. So her room assignment changed from the penthouse ICU to the seventh floor in a semi-private room. They asked her if she wanted to make the transition by wheel chair or walk. She chose to walk. Wow, that was the longest walk she has had since she walked into the OR two weeks ago. Before she left, they removed three more drainage tubes and took half of her staples out. She also has no monitors hooked up to her. All she has is an oxygen tube in her nose and the feeding tube connected to her intestine.

So, with all these transitions and with very few tubes to get in her way in and out of bed, you would think that she would have begged to run in this marathon which ran past her hospital window yesterday. Not so! She is still in a marathon recovery stage. Except for a few wonderful visitors that she had today, she basically slept the whole day and evening. She didn't have much energy or appetite to eat anything all day. She did have several doses of pain killers because she did have pain. The pain is still in the scratched chest and where the big hoses used to be. I think this particular pain killer that she had all day makes her very sleepy. Today's naps were longer and deeper than in past days which I think is good for her.

Nobody has said a word about release date so I can't bring you up to date on that. It is probably is at least Wednesday. My 93-year old Uncle Bob, one of the former chiefs of staff here in this hospital, gives her the message to not leave the hospital too soon. She worried today if she could make it at home yet. So maybe it is good to slow down a little and make sure she is ready to get out. She has had so much going on in this body. Another few days might be a real blessing.

So that is the 15th day in the life of Louise in the hospital. Thanks for your wonderful well wishes and comments.

Spence

Day 14: Hurting Hoses are History!!

2011-01-16T22:30:00.002-07:00

Louise lost 4 tubes but, most importantly, the last two hurting hoses were removed. Those chest tubes are what have caused her the most pain in the hospital. You would think it would be her two big incisions or the new connection of her stomach and esophagus. No, it was mostly these big chest tubes. They were probably 1/2 to 3/4 inch in diameter and were put in between her ribs all the way to the middle of her back on both sides. They have been there for 14 days. Today the last two on her right side were taken out. She also lost the epidural in her back and her catheter. It will help her so much not to have that pain. But it also means that her lungs and chest cavity are working the way they should and there are no air pockets left in her chest. It also means the fluids in the chest can be easily absorbed by her body. That marks a ticket for her release soon.

I wish I could say that she was without pain, but I can't. I think her braised chest is still pretty painful. That pain is supposed to go away soon. But she still has to get pain medication and it still played tricks on her conscious mind. She can fall in and out of sleep in 2 minutes and have something silly to say each time she wakes up. But she laughs about it too because she knows she is daydreaming. She had a very good afternoon and even got a visit from my parents. That was real fun for her. She walked 3 laps around the pod and it was so amazing to see how much faster they could get her ready without all the tubes. She still has 3 drainage J-tubes on her neck and abdomen, but they are small and so are the containers they are attached to. They won't come out until she leaves the hospital. She also has a feeding tube that will stay with her after the hospital until she can get enough oral nourishment. They also will need to take out the thousands of staples she has all over her body before she leaves. Right now she looks like she has several long zippers.

As you can tell I am anxious to see her released from the hospital. I think she is getting close even though she is in ICU still. She really qualifies to be out of ICU at this point, but I think this hospital has open beds in ICU and not in the other rooms. I am guessing, if nothing else goes wrong, that she could be released from the hospital on Tuesday or Wednesday. They haven't told us that but that is my guess.

I apologize for rambling and I know my grammar is atrocious, but you'll have to decipher what you can from this since I'm in a hurry to finish and go to bed.

Good night to you late readers who comment at all hours of the morning. You need to go to bed earlier also.

Spence

Day 13: Less Drama, The Light In Her Eyes Returns

2011-01-15T23:18:00.003-07:00

Phew!! I was ready for a less eventful day and more sparkle in her eyes to return. When I arrived upon the scene this morning, Louise was already sitting up in her chair. I could tell that she was no longer heavily drugged, but she was kind of in the "hangover" stage. She still had some pain in her upper chest and hadn't been able to eat anything for breakfast. Her heart rate was at 128 just sitting there. I was concerned and let the nurse know that she needed to do something to make her feel better and get the heart rate down. Sometimes the nurses need to worry more. They can take lessons from me because I have the reputation for knowing how to worry. Anyway, she went and called the doctor who suggested that Louise was probably dehydrated. So she brought one bag of saline, hooked it up and within 20 minutes her heart rate went down to about 100 and she started feeling a lot better. As the morning wore on, you could really see things changing. The pain was less and the old Louise was coming back. Both Kelsey and I really saw the light come on in her smiley eyes. What a relief.

The big bonus was that they came in and removed the left side garden hose like they said they might. That leads me to think that tomorrow they will remove the other two right side tubes and finally take out the main source of pain. Most of the rest of her pain has been caused by her upper chest abrasion which is not controlled by the lower epidural. That pain is supposed to go away soon also.

This evening, before she went to bed (for the first time today) she took two laps around the pod. She did well with that. I think she will do so much more of the walking in the days to come. She needs to find her strength back because she has been pretty weak. She also ate her soft foods very well both lunch and dinner. I am so encouraged by some of the things she can now eat. They won't let her eat real solids yet, but what she is eating, like thick pudding and thick soup is more than she could ever eat before this surgery. What a blessing to see her eat again!!

So, we are so thankful that prayers have been answered and that she really turned the corner today. Thanks again for your concern. Sorry Peggy that I was late with my post!

Spence